Wednesday, April 11, 2007

Boss Stewie is a Murderer

If you're wondering why I haven't updated in two days... it's because I've been in shock.

Just two days ago I was a happy Stewie.

I jumped out of the bed in the morning, sang Whitney Houston's "I Will Always Love You" in the shower, and had corn beef with bread for breakfast.


I was a Happy Stewie!

Happy Stewie then jumped into his car in the morning with Ming and Jazz (another Nuffnang team member), and we drove off to work.

I was driving down the road of a nice quite suburb. Ming and I were debating issues as usual when suddenly I saw a flock of birds from the side of the road take off and fly across my car.

I nearly hit all of them with my car... but I did hit ONE.

"POOF", I heard the sound of a bird reflect off the bonnet of my car.

As it impacted the front of my car in mid-air, it suddenly dropped dead towards the side of the road.

Ming shouted in response "F*CK DUDE... DID YOU JUST KILL A BIRD?"

Boss Stewie is a murderer :(

Please forgive me oh leetle birdy... Please don't come back to haunt me...

33 comments:

ItchyHandseng said...

oo am i the first? hahaha
Send boss stewie to jail.haha.jk

ItchyHandseng said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
sapiens said...

The poor birdy will come back and kill your little birdy! LoL...

dEvIlInE said...

how sad! sobs ..lets us pray for its souls to rest in peace and have a better luck next life...

Vicky said...

oh ho, i duno !
oh ho, i duno !

*saying it in the kindergarten tune*

you're quite good man, i hv tried hitting pigeons, birds but no luck.

giovoni said...

Remember the mail I sent you on Thu, Mar 8, 2007 at 2:57 PM:

- Here's a feng shui tip for next month (April): you'll be going through some tough time - just hang in there, it's just one of those really bad months in your chart. Believe in yourself, and things will be better in May.

If you can survive 2007, 2008 will be the year where you will probably receive the help of Tai Sui and the biggest Gui Ren ever for your business.

If not I will give you FOC advice on how to brand Netccentric & Nuffnang - lol...

Boss Stewie said...

itchy: hmph.. if i go.. i'll drag u down with me and say that u threw the bird in front of my car

sapiens: lol

devil: *sniff*.. *moment of silence*

vicky: ahahah lol

giovoni: wah... are u some feng shui master? what chart are u talking about? that mole thing?

her Fei-ness said...

there's a reason brakes are installed in a car, boss. Or should I say, bird bird killer!

Tsk tsk. But car got dent anot?

Hor ny Ang Moh said...

Hallo Bossy!! Normal lah! That is road kill!! Over here if it is a big bird we knock down ( chicken for eg ) we will stop & pick it up & have free chicken curry that night!!! But that is rare. Very comon is snake & dog both not eddible. Hope this cheer up ur mind.

William Leong said...

horny... dog edible wat! snake also can. very good for body (the chinese say one)

bird kenot la, no meat.

f*ck dude, did u just kill a bird?! Repent or not? give me ur leetle car or else u shall pay by belly dancing. which shall you choose!?

you bastardo!

suicidalconversationjunkie said...

You, bad boy. GO TO JAIL!! OFF WITH HIS BIRDie!!!

but you're still loved ok, after all you ARE hot. maybe the bird just wanted some attention from you. :p

Little Ray said...

Poor birdy =(

giovoni said...
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William Leong said...

suicide bomber... just that the one that hit ur car was a dud.

Doreen said...

that's nasty boss. now no one's gonna vote u as the Hottest Male Blogger.

mae said...

Did you ever think that it might have tried to commit suicide by flying in front of your car? So technically, you didn't kill it, it killed itself! :P

But then you did partake in the heinous crime by providing the car, so you still could go to jail for "accidental homicide". Oh poo. But you're still the "Hottest Male Blogger"!! :D

Quistreous said...

Nice new entry! Been following your blog for quite some time(introduced by your sister, Fayth) and I have always find them interesting.

Dont worry about birdie. Many road accidents happen. At least you can still reassure yourself that the bird "deliberately JUMPED/FLEW towards your car". Its just a bird. At least you didnt bang a cat/dog/iguana crossing the road. That would be CRUEL!

Quistreous said...
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MaN|acZ said...

farnee.. why this posts so many comments got deleted wan ar?

Boss, told u alredi.. pay attention when you're on the road.

:P

William Leong said...

Quistreous, what u mean its JUST a bird... a bird also got mother ok, a bird also got life ok, a bird also got the right to live ok... a bird... (you get the flow)~~~

Jen said...

yesssss!! kill them!! kill them all!! *maniacal look grows in eyes*

you should have swerved the car and go after all the other birds that you missed so that they can join their brother. mmm.. 300 still playing in my head sowi =P

Yii Toong said...

Must to temple and pai pai

Gwen said...

Did you at least pick up the corpse (redneck style) and then take it home and cook it to eat?

That way the bird didn't die in vain.

"Look maw, me an' paw got roadkill!"

clement said...

let it die not in vain... kill it quick!!

-blake- said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
-blake- said...

Once, a bird flew in my room, hit the spinning fan and died.

Aaron Chua said...

hey dude! I killed a pigeon too! Hit it when I was driving pass the traffic light. lol~

James Yeang said...

Poor bird :)

Boss Stewie said...

her feiness: no ler.. car no dent... i hit a bird.. not an elephant

hor ny: lol!!! you really make me laugh lor!!!

william: *Sniff*... if i give u my leetle car then how do i get to work?


suicidal: noooo i dun wanna go to jail!!!

little ray: yes poor birdy!

doreen: NOOOOOOOOOOOoooooooo... ah it's okay.. i never stood a chance anyway

mae: *SNIFF*

quis: actually.. i once saw a snake on the road..a huge snake.. and i ran over it.. but it didn't die.. maybe i should've went back and finished the job

maniacz: dunno wor.. not me who delete

jen: LOL!!!

yii toong: hehe lol

gwen: noooo ... that wouldn't be right

clement: LOL

blake: HOW COULD U DO THAT... YOU KILLED THAT BIRD TOO!!!

aaron: HAHAHA YOU MURDERER !!!!

james: :P

Chapree Da Grande said...

How you know that the birds are not on a suicide mission? If they are, you can't be held guilty. :P

Boss Stewie said...

chapree: great! so how do i prove suicide on those birds :P

Aaron Chua said...

I feed birds, that be my redemption~
lol

Gwen said...

apalar ... you eat kfc right? same thing what :p