Saturday, January 05, 2008

Boss Stewie Reveals His Addiction

I have a confession to make.

I am addict.

I don't know why I started.

It started with just one try.

One of my friends pushed me into trying it, saying that it's just once... nothing wrong with that and just one time won't get you addicted.I believed him and I decided to try that one time.

I never went back then.

I remember when it first went into my body. I first felt a tingling sensation.... and then a deep sigh of relaxation.

It felt good... it felt so good.

I tried to stay away from it the next day, but I couldn't stop thinking about it.

I thought to myself
"Hey... what harm could ONE more do?"

And so I took it again for the second time... which then led to the third... fourth... and before I know it, today I can't do without it.

Every day without fail, I had to have at least one shot.

Some days, I have 4-5 of them in a row. I know its never good to have so many.

But my day just isn't right without it.I hide a stockpile of it in my fridge.... but I know that someday someone will open my fridge looking for food.


But instead find... an entire stockpile of YAKULT.I can't help it.

Yakult now has me by the balls.

A few of my friends tried to talk me out of my addiction.

Sam: You know you're not supposed to take so many of those each day.
Me: But it's a healthy drink!

Sam: Yes but you're supposed to have ONE a day. You're not supposed to use it as a replacement for water.


Me: But... but... I'm going to be away for a week after tomorrow. I'm not going to be able to have it for a whole week so I'm just having more now to make up for the rest of the week.


Teoh: Uhmm.. unfortunately.. that's not how your body works.

Me: What do you mean that's not how my body works??? Eventually at the end of 7 days, I am going to have 7 Yakult's in my blood. What difference does it make if I have it now or later?

Teoh: In that case, then you might as well shower 14 times today so you won't have to shower for the rest of the week. (Or pee 50 times today so you won't have to pee for a whole week).

Me: ... ... ...



35 comments:

haan said...

of course that's not how your body works.. unless u r a cow... oops... not cow.. but ox.. :)

Nicole said...

me like yakult! it's the best drink!!

BumbleBee™ said...

boss, vitagen better XD

chocolat-latte' said...

Yakult rox!!
eh.. did you know Yakult now delivers up to your place?
EVEN IF YOU PURCHASE ONE!

My mom caught them.. then my mom stock up for me..

and she told me.. yea, call them, and they deliver up to you and they're everywhere now.

AND it's cheaper by RM0.20 and it's more fresh too compared to the ones you buy it off the shelf at supermarkets.

cause this people come straight from the factory.. akakakaka

*Audrey jumps with joyyy*

Glorious Yakult!

SaeWei said...

erm....sweats =_____="

Hui Yi said...

At the beginning of the blog i thought u r addited to Haagen Dazs..somemore u shows a fridge..but anyway, Yakult is much more healtier

Boss Stewie said...

haan: u mean oxs work like that? so like.. we can let them rest for 2 years then put them to work for another 2 years straight without rest and they won't roll over and die?

nico: YEAH!!!

bumble: yeah vitagen is more generous when it comes to the bottles they sell.. and quite ok also ler.. but i dont' know why i'm addicted to yakult and not vitagen

choc: what? where do i order for deliverY?

sae: haha!!

hui: hahahaha yes yes.. i think in moderate dosages.. yakult is healthy

ZB said...

i think tim teoh is really smart. and yea.. you should pee 50 times a day so that you don't need to waste so much time going to the toilet. think about it, you'd be more productive by saving those time walking to the toilet!

Suet Li said...

eh eh last time right i stole a few yakults from your fridge hoho. sam said cant tell u if not u'll kill me but now i guess u can do me no harm so secret's out!

Anonymous said...

Yakult is nice! too bad its in so puny a bottle ler -.-

FeR said...

*haha*

kena kantoi balik...

your friends have got logical basis of argument, though. :D

btw, they say if name of a person is often mentioned, there's something going on. *cheeky grin* and since this person has been mentioned so many times on your blog and even pictures of her with you during NY eve...*BIG cheeky grin*

MaE : ) said...

yakult sucks but god i love the straw! such high technology.

i once drank 5 in a row and i felt like dying after that.
bacteria overkill :/

Daren said...

yakult makes you lao sia,
DAILY.

pinksterz said...

aiseh u look so cute in that pic. like overgrown boy like that. LOL!

Zephyr said...

lol....you can 'make business' in the toilet 7-10 times in a day too so you won't need to clear your 'storage between 2 mountain' for the rest of the week

Btw, you can become diabetic if you drink too much of this.

XiangMei said...

Tim!!!!!!!

U look so Kiddie!

Angkukukuku!!
Cutie!

me. said...

LOL! why pee 50 times a day..waste time jek. XD pee for two hours straight gau dim lo. funny post

Chee Ching said...

Your friend do have a point though. Hahaha.

Mel said...

Haha boss, sot lah you. Btw, i was in Four Seasons Bayswater over the weekend specially to try their roast duck. I took a bite and i think i had a tiny orgasm.

It's sooooo good. The fat+crispy skin+soft succulent meat... 8 of us shared 2 whole ducks and it was NOT enough. Too bad Leeds is so far away from London :(

Rasa Malaysia said...

Hi Timothy,

This is Bee Yinn of Rasa Malaysia (http://www.rasamalaysia.com). I have just added NuffNang ad codes on my blog. I wanted you to know that I am in your ad program now. :)

Even though I am based in the US, I do have many readers in MY and SIN. How can I also monetize my Singaporean PVs?

I don't have your email, but please feel free to email me back at bylow919@gmail.com.

Thanks a bunch!!

LeangFM said...

hmmmmmm.... your friend teoh really geng!

2nd hmmmmm.... i kinda agree with the commentor fer

*grins alongside with fer*
ahaks

Super Gentleman said...

i tot its hagan daaz icecream again dis time... LoL... glad u found another addiction... hahahz...

***cinDee*** said...

lol... pee 50 times ;P
pee till come out blood man!

Unknown said...

lol.. funny post.. haven;t had yakult in a long time... prefer vitagen.. but don't think UK has vitagen.. hmm...

i tot u were addicted to coffee when i started reading.. haha..

LogicYuan said...

yakult is more "yohgurty" than vitagen...

kena 'tembak' by Teoh..lol bathe 14 times n pee 50 times...lol

Christine Wong said...

careful oo..too much of those are really not good for you, especially for your digestion system.

Remember: Moderation is the best.

kimfei said...

haha..i like the conversation,thats the type of response i give to my younger bro when they talk such thing to me..

The Author said...

i like yakult too~~
btw u look funny in the corner drinking yakult

TheBeerCrusader said...

Boss !!

I'm also an addict of Yakult !!! :)

"Joe" who is constantly craving said...

hahah wat a joker..traitor la..i still prefer vitagen!!

Unknown said...

You make me sick *looks away


..I now know to go steal some the next time I drop by your place

Unknown said...

its good, but not too much. each bottle contains dunno how many billion shirota bacteria... and now you would be putting in like zillions of bacteria in your stomach. hehe

Stella said...

My sister wanted to hijack the delivery truck. -_-

sz said...

ends up u will get stomach ache or diarrhea, haha, or u purposely want to slim down

Anonymous said...

hey in hong kong there is a guy that drank 100ml bottles , of yakult , 15 bottle at one time . the most , he drank in a month is 5 bottles a day for over a month thats an addict that like bottle over 150+