Friday, April 06, 2007

Cybercafe Stories

Ahhh cybercafes....

Where I wasted soo much of my life.

I used to spend almost 10 hours each day in a cybercafe playing Counterstrike back when it was still very very new (Beta 3).

It was ridiculous! If I had spent 1/10th of that time doing something productive like read a book, I would be a much better man today.

I was talking to a friend of mine and we started talking about funny things we're heard happen in Cybercafes.


Story 1

This actually happened in my college library many years ago. You know how college libraries these days come fully equipped with the best computers you can find for students to do research on.

Once I was studying in the library and I saw a rather peculiar guy consistently refreshing his Hotmail mailbox. Wondering what the heck he was doing, I peered closer only to find that he actually had a little browser window opened.

And in that little browser window on the right corner of his screen, was a picture of a naked girl.. or at least a quarter of a picture of a naked girl like this.

The dude was surfing porn, but he was too shy to open the entire browser window, so he decided to instead open a small window to view part of a picture.

Then scroll up down (and left right) to slowly see the rest.


The poor poor dudeeeee....

Story 2

Some guys were playing Counterstrike in a cybercafe. You know how cybercafes are, noisy, smokey and full of guys cursing
"NIAMA!!! WHAT A FAKE SHOT!!!".

Then somewhere in the midst of a high pressured Counterstrike game, a 15-year old boy managed to sneak up behind his opponent (in the game) and knife the opponent to death.

The gangster-looking person playing the opponent on the other side of the cybercafe shouted
"BASTARD YOU!!! BELAKANG MARI!!! NO SKILL AR?!?!?"

The 15-year old boy laughed
"AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA YOU LAH DIN SEE ME COMING... YOU NOOOB!!!!!".

The gangster dude then got up from his seat and walked towards the boy who was busy playing away on the next round.

The gangster took out a REAL KNIFE... and stabbed the kid in the back.
Then he laughed
"HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!! YOU DIN SEE ME COMING!!! YOU NOOOB!!! KENA BELAKANG MARI!!!"

I think he got arrested after that but I'm not sure.

Story 3

This is my favourite story of all the ones I've heard, which actually happened to a friend of a friend.

Again because of a very high-pressured game of Counterstrike late one night, a few guys got up from their seats and started shouting at each other, calling each other cheaters.
Then one of them said
"OKAY!!! COME WE SETTLE OUTSIDE".

And they all went outside the cybercafe to fight it out.

It didn't take long before the police arrived and broke up the fight.

But the funny thing is this.

When the police arrived, they walked into the cybercafe and saw everyone playing away at their computers not knowing anything.

One of the policemen walked around the dark noisy room full of computers and turned on his torch light to shine at all the guys there.

He then shouted
"SEMUA BALIK RUMAH SEKARANG!!!".

One of the guys turned at the policeman and said
"Boss... last game last game!!!".



32 comments:

Wingz said...

1st!!! I won I won!!!

ItchyHandseng said...

wah interesting cyber cafe stories.All of them true 1?or u made it up?hahaha

Boss Stewie said...

wingz: hhahha lol

itchy: the first one is confirmed true cuz that was me myself.. the second one i heard from a friend so i don't know how true... the 3rd one happened to a friend of a friend so i also don't know how accurate that account was :P

suicidalconversationjunkie said...

wa!!! boss!! that was "me myself"??!?!?!? so you were the poor poor dudeeeee who was watching porn in the library laaaa.. ya allah watch porn then balik rumah watch la.. so susah use a quarter of a window for wat.. muahahahahah :p

Yii Toong said...

Ah the nostalgia...

Dr. Tan said...

HAha what the fu...

Yeah man I miss CS. We should probably have a bloggers' CS thingie, since I find it pretty hard to find CS-ers nowadays. Well, its probably because I don't look hard enough.

William Leong said...

Dr.Tan..... i SECOND THAT kao kao....... another great ideaa... woohoooo....

poor poor boss you!!! at least la open half screen. or if got the balls, press F11~!!!

mae said...

Cybercafe is a scary place for me.. Unless of course, it was room full of noisy computers with the kids playing Maplestory. Haha :P

William Leong said...

b23.,.,.,.,.b04 *sound of bullets in magazines*

wwwwwww *click click click* 44 *click*

Arsky said...

Hmmmm unreal tournament is still da best ~ DOminating ~ HEADSHOT!

Gwen said...

My story is me vs 3 other guys, my team all dead already. de_dust ... I'm standing at the CT starting area then went to the tunnel and sat there waiting for the other 3 guys to find me. How to move lah 3 vs 1 SO WHAT I CAMP! AND DAMN PROUD OF IT!

Anyway ...

So I'm sitting there with my AWP and they come out repeatedly kill them. The last guy (some stranger) is busy spraying his sig on the wall in the tunnel, wasting time. So all the guys yelling in the cafe "FASTER LA WOI YOU THINK FREE WAN ARR?!?" to which the guy yelled back:

"SHADDAP, IT'S GWEN OK? DIU!"

The fella damn scared to come out. Sure die. I think my teammates/friends all laughing like hell. And that's my favorite CS moment EVER. My least favorite is when I ran around a corner and my brother headshotted me with a shotgun (he was only like 9 yrs old) damn chicken ok.

Andrew said...

NIAMA WINGZZ! I DIDNT SEE YOU COMING! YOU BELAKANG MARI ME TO GET NUMBER 1!
err..does that make me a noob?

haha boss your first story is the best lah, damn kelian the guy, but why do it in a public area...
so how did you continue using your computer knowing the guy next to you had a hard-on? :)

Boss Stewie said...

suicidal: when i said me myself i mean that i was the one who saw it lar... haih

yii toong: lol mr cheahh


dr tan: ahh i'm too old di... my reflexes slow

william: ehhh... that wasn't me larr ... hahaha i should really rephrase that


mae: i think that's a kindergarten u're referring to.. not a cybercafe :P

arsky: ahhh unreal tournament... a lot of senseless killing

gwen: lol.. i would be scared of u too gwen... i hate awp campers!!!

andrew: hahaha actually i wasn't using a computer.. i was sitting on one of the tables studying.. my table just happened to be overlooking the computer he was using... hehehe

William Leong said...

awp campers no balls (gwen, no offence ya).

i dun play in cc's. play in the hostel network in campus also same thing. the fun...

her Fei-ness said...

belakang mari. Sounds so wrong man.

I never did go to CCs much. Waste money la. Almost all my CS times were at home, with bots..and you can "belakang mari" just about all of them. =P

eh boss, how did u get the players all stacked up in the last pic? look so cute la...hehe

Lance de'Cypher said...

*walks to each person's pc*

*pushes power button*

Gwen said...

Memang no balls what :P

But it wasn't because I was camping that he was scared. It's because I was probably one of the best female players in the Taman Desa area hahahahaha

suicidalconversationjunkie said...

boss don't blame your slow reflexes on age.. you can only blame it on.. *looks to flabby areas*

bwahahahhahahaha :p

Boss Stewie said...

william: chiuu.. my uni last time got nobody play cs on the network wan

her fei: hehehe i got that picture somewhere else on the internet.. but i've seen that happen before so many times when playing

lance: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHHAHA

gwen: AI CHEH!!!.. best female player in TAMAN DESA... how many female players were there in Taman Desa anyway?

suicidal: DID U JUST CALL ME PHAT?

Hor ny Ang Moh said...

Hi Bossy!!I am being refeshing your sites several time, how cum no small pic as shown in pic which show small pic of na kel lady??

Jayelle said...

21st!! YAYYYY!!!!!


I found the second story very disturbing..:( :( I hope it's definitely not true.

kahpeng said...

wa boss, counterstrike kaki oso kah ? hmmn.....when free muz "test power" oso. lol....i so long didn't play adi...last time F3-F5 active playing, from b'worth take ferry - bus-1 stop pyramid play - bus - ferry back every saturday, lol :P now my skills sux adi, but use sniper can "tipu makan" a bit la, lol

Jason said...

I'm only good at snipping / camping and thats why all my 6 housemates hated me to their bones. :D

Gwen said...

3 female players hahaha

But the issue still stands that I could kill as good as any one of you :P Top 3 players of the world, one of them is female what ... so keng lah I worship her :) she's hot too

.:»Ares«:. said...

Ah CS.. reminisce the old times. I hate campers with AWP.. just so predictable. =D (no offence)

Bam bam!!
SG550 (4-4 Terrorist) bullpup (4-5 CT?) and M4A1 (4-3 CT) for me!! Jamin headshot at medium range. =P

Boss Stewie said...

hor ny: hahaha!!! u wan see that pic... u looking at wrong place ler hor ny

jayelle: i think my firend told me it came out in the newspapers that wan

kahpeng: eh last time i also pyramid kaki wei! i go when it open at 11 or 12am, then i play until 7pm non-stop.... my poor girlfriend at the time also will just sit and watch me play..then at the end of every session sure kena marah for 'neglecting' her.... but not my fault rite!! she wan to come wan!!!

jason: OOHHHH I kenot tahan sniper/campers!!! lucky u feed me with mille crepe... otherwiseeee

gwen: eh? who? show?

ares: well if you play big public games and you want to have lots of kills and low deaths, then u should be a sniper... let all ur team mates go and be bait.. then u chap sei kai!!!

lufiasism said...

nostalgic nostalgic..... u tak go CS with BBGun back in London arr ? wasted only if you didn't... if not...really belakang mari get shot by M4 carbine BBGun XD hahhaha

anthraxxxx said...

awww the good ol` days. I remember I used to play FIFA with my friends in the cafe until the next morning and the hourly rate was freaking expensive back then.

Kenny Ng said...

I never really hang out at cybercafe, it sounds more 'ganas' than my old days used to play those 20 cent slot video game machine center.

Boss Lepton said...

Boss I miss our CS + Wine session.....

giovoni said...

Back during my time (yes I am that old), computers were still the mono-green types. But we have 'ting-ting' - was it Silverhawk at Pulau Tikus? And the 'it' game was Street Fighter - very, very addictive. As for other 'entertainment', most were the printed variety, and I know of a certain Brother who collects 'entertainment' as a hobby. The amount this Bro. has is amazing; of course all these are top-rate and artistic - none of those amateurish, home-made trash. He always joke why he is still single because relationships are just too complicated and that he wears a 'white skirt' to work everyday...

Y.E@eevet said...

Never been to a cc b4.. seems like it's quite an interesting place..so happening.. lol