Tuesday, July 22, 2008

What I Look For In A Girl & Why I Wanna Get Married

For those of you who remember, I was in Vancouver last week mainly for my cousin's wedding.

Being there at his wedding gave me some food for thought about marriage.

I'm 24 this year and I admit that I have thought more than once about what is the right age for me to get married.Back in the younger days, while I was still a student, marriage was something totally out of the question and for good reason. We were all still young and our minds had yet to mature to a stage that we know what we want.

Now however, even at my relatively young and tender age I feel that I know what I want in a wife now and if I do find it, I won't hesitate to get married.

So the question is, what is it that I really look for in a girl.

Well... shamefully I have to admit that when I was in my teens all the way up to say... 21, my only criteria for a girlfriend was that she had to be HOT.
But now as I grow relatively older I see that the things I look for in a girl kinda change. Now a girl's looks become really really secondary.

She need not be hot, she just needs to be decent looking but what she has to have is a good sense of humour, a cheerful personality and most importantly intelligence.

I like an intelligent girl who can be mentally stimulating and the kind where I can go home after a long day's work and talk to her about my problems at work and she'll give me a real solution or put things in a perspective that may make me not worry about it so much anymore.

Something rather than the usual "Don't worry... I'm sure it'll be okay" because unfortunately, that line doesn't work too well in helping us manage the stress right?

Well unless she gets me to put on my lion suit and makes me ROAR!!!

Surely I'll feel better after that.So if I find a girl like that and I'm sure about what I see then heck I'll go get married.

And I don't think I'm the only one.

Just a couple of years after graduation I've been seeing so many of my friends get married one by one (sure some of them were shotgun marriages but I don't see the big deal with that. Dammit if I loved a girl and we had a shotgun marriage I would gladly tell everyone at my wedding dinner that it was an accident, but an accident I'm glad happened).

Heck, 2 of my ex-girlfriends have already gotten married and at the end of last year, I attended the wedding of one of my best university friends with my Middle-Eastern buddy Hasan who flew in to Malaysia just for the wedding.

But yet, when I talk about getting married, some people try to discourage me possibly for my own good and here are the main two concerns people have.

1) "Build your career first then only get married."

Well I tend to view things a little differently.

I believe in the saying that in any successful man, there is a woman behind him. I believe that the wife has a direct influence on a man's success (or failure).

So that tells you that your wife is going help you get to where you want in your career, and you don't have to do it all alone! Besides, I'm sure our parents didn't marry at the peak of their careers, they all got married when they were still building their careers and were there for each other during the hard times.Of course there is the question of financial stability and maybe my opinion is a little skewed now since unlike 2 years ago when I just graduated, I feel like I now have achieved some kind of financial stability.

But either ways, I believe that whether rich or poor, a great couple is a couple that endures hardship together.

I know of this successful entrepreneur in Malaysia who got married at a young age while he was still struggling. During the first few years of his marriage, his business that was doing well for a while eventually failed so his wife supported him by working to put food on the table for the family while he worked on another business.

That other business he built today is worth hundreds of millions and today his wife doesn't need to work no more.


2) "Don't marry so early. Enjoy yourself while you're still young".Well the way I look at it is that marriage is just the next phase in our lives.

The stigma or at least the influence from many movies we watch is that once you get married, you lose your freedom and you're tied down forever. While there is some truth in that, I like to think the cons are a little exaggerated and the pros of not getting married are a little overplayed.

Ok one of the pros people talk about is that you get to be in a variety of relationships throughout the years. Well to be frank, I can't say that I've been in a lot myself but I think I've been in enough to feel that after a while, each different relationship feels kind of the same anyway.

Then there is the fear of getting married.

I mean sure you probably would have more responsibilities but look at the bright side, for the rest of your life you get to wake up to someone you love and whenever you're in trouble or worry, you know that someone will always be there for you when you go home.
Now if you think about that, why try to delay marriage? If you meet the one, go for it.

I know I would if I met her.

Any of my married readers disagree with me or think I'm high on weed?

73 comments:

Alexander Chang said...

dunno to agree or not also ... still too young 2 think of all these ... but i agree ... "She need not be hot, she just needs to be decent looking but what she has to have is a good sense of humour, a cheerful personality and most importantly intelligence."

Boss Lepton said...

boss, steady la steady

Nicocoa said...

i love this entry.. a lot.

JayneAi said...

wow dint know that guys do share the same thoughts of how their ideal love one should be like...the right one will come..dint know you're just 24 yrs old only..same age with my sis...still young..wishing you all the best..
GBU

estherlauderlyn said...

Timmy tiah! You forgot one more thing - she must LOVE dancing too remember? :p Im just kidding. Just dont go feeding Joel with mental rubbish when I'm not here ah. I'm watching you...

Tricia Ong said...

I agree with you. If you meet the one, go for it. Enjoy life with your better half because life is too short hopping around. As for career, it is never fully established. MAN is never satisfied.

VainPrincess Dot Com said...

Love this entry! It nakes me think further.

Kay said...

i like Hasan =D lol, relax la boss, it'll come in time =)

Boss Stewie said...

nico: haha thank u nicole

jay: yes you'd be surprised... :P Thank u

esther: yes yes u're right, would be nicer if she loved dancing too lah so we have something in common.. and no no i wouldn't dare say anything to joel..

tricia: yeah... man is never fully satisfied :P

vain: thank u :P made me think a long time too

kay: hahaha... i miss Hasan

Boss Stewie said...

boss lepton: Haih I know you're getting married soon!

lufiasism said...

an excellent post you got there boss....like what you have written above like "Don't marry so early. Enjoy yourself while you're still young" , "once you get married, you lose your freedom and you're tied down forever" and stuff like that...

It is scary though if u look at the reality of your words with the example of Japan... People want to enjoy when they are young and see people are not getting married even at their 30s... Then found themselves not worthy of getting married (esp the women)...

Don't forget about kids, they would have a lil' hard time with their parents in communication and having a good time together (when the kid is still young). It's challenging but life is nothing without challenges...

"Build your career first then only get married."

I've always thought of that but I think after a hard day work and nobody to comfort me, it gets more stressful...

Leon said...

That Vancouver stuff must be pretty strong.

BaLQiz said...

hmmm I'm going to get my husband to read this post of yours. Just to remind him it was not the worst thing in life to be married but then again...

Autumn Babe said...

boss~ are u implying this post to a girl that you love her and wanna get married? or you want to tell your readers first that you might have a shotgun marriage?

billy said...

Dude .. just one word of advice - it's good being married cos there are stuff that u can get in being married that you cant find elsewhere .. BUT ..

just get someone who shares the same interests and hobbies as you do .. cos love MAY be blind when it's not blind forever and when u finally wake up to the reality of marriage .. love and sex wont hack it anymore and without common interests you might find yourselves living separate lives .. and hey im talking about like 15-20 years after being married ...


http://poorconfusedcomplicatedfool.blogspot.com

KY said...

make it happen!!!!

ch3rylism said...

no such thing as to right or wrong timing, it's more to whether YOU (& your spouse-to-be) are ready. just do it! :)

LazyBum said...

When the time comes, it just comes. And when the right person comes, it just comes as THE ONE. And you will just know it.

Age is not much of a barrier in marriage though. A very interesting post...something that I have been pondering all this while n now i am Thinking "P. Good Luck!

AnD said...

If you are just looking for girl who can give you solution for your work, then don’t marry. Because if she can give you solutions for your work problem, she should taking over your position in the work place and you should be cooking dinner at home and waiting for her to come back home after a hard day entertainment clients in a pub. ; )

My point is, don’t hold expectation, because your expectation will fails you. What if she is tired and wants someone to listen to her too. It is not a matter of getting married early or late. Relationship is a two-way thing. If you are always selfishly receiving or stupidly giving, then even if you get married at 50, you will still divorce in the end.

I got married at 20…. Ok, you must be thinking now, this person must have a very unhappy marriage since she married young. On the contrary, we are going to celebrate our 10th wedding anniversary soon and we have 2 lovely children with the oldest being 8. (in case, you think that it was shotgun)

Initial years were hard. We are always asking ourselves why isn’t my husband/wife doing this or that for me. Why no roses on Valentine’s Day/Birthday/Anniversary day? Why doesn’t she understand that I am stressed at work? Why Why Why?

There were plenty of quarrels, sadness and unhappiness. But, it is through all these quarrels that we understand each other better. Now, we expect less of the other party and do more for each other.

Like bringing his mum for a walk. Buying gifts for his family members. Listen patiently when I pour out my work troubles etc. These are all the little things that add up. Someone told me, mountain climbing is hard, marriage is even harder. Think carefully, will I be able to let go of my ego to apologise, will I be able to accept that if she throws her temper, I will calm down and ask her how her day is? Will she go through thick and thin with me?

Very important last question. Will she give up buying LV bags for milk powder?

spectre said...

Dude,chill down out a bit and you left out the best part,the "where" and "when" part. Er! Does this meant you going have a shotgun marriage soon.

Monica said...

totally agree with your points.

i don't see having a wife/husband changes your lifestyle. but having a kid does.

if you still travel a lot, wanna see the world, then having kids will make it extra extra difficult. i'm not saying it's a bad thing. having a kid is a wonderful experience, but it's a life changing one. it's a new life that changes your old one. sometimes you won't even remember how you lived your life before that.

every life decision is important. make sure you don't regret it.

there'll be surprises too, even though you knew your partner for years prior to marriage. living with someone requires compromising even if it's only for little things.

bottom line is, it will change you. hopefully to a better you. a better man, a husband. bear in mind, it will change her too.

good luck, i hope you find her. you'll know when it's time.

Boss Stewie said...

Lufia: I always thought women want to get married earlier than men do. You know.. for the cited biological reasons

Leon: yeah hahaha

Balqiz: ahhahaha yes I’m sure it’s not too bad

Autumn: hahahahaha neither lar.. just sharing my thought.. but I’m the kind of person that always questions traditions or certain old mindsets so I wouldn’t mind a shotgun marriage.. as long as she’s the right one

Billy: Yeah that’s a good point… Ok will keep that in mind man thanks for the advice.

Ky: Haha!

Ch3rylism: aihh.. yes yes… that is true though many people, before they decide whether they are ready or not, they look at the factual number of their age

Lazy: Thanks dude :P

And: Hey I think that’s a slight misconception people may have. A smart woman need not necessarily be a dominant career kind of woman that wants to wear the pants in the relationship> I have seen a lot of smart women that live a marriage as a partnership rather than as a dictatorship.

Spectre: hahaha!! Not that I know off so far…

Monica: Well that’s great because I’m not a great fan of traveling and like sticking to ne place but yeah… I’m sure life changes when you have a kid, though it may not necessarily be a change for the worse :P I love kids.

§oŁЇtǺ®ÿ ®o§ě said...

good points said there..what is there to be afraid of marriages?..Money is not everything especially without having love ones.. i say to live life to the fullest is by being spontaneous and reacting to the moment...So if you have indeed found 'HER' and think that she is the person you want to wake up to every morning...Just do it! Anything that is given too much thought, in the end just somehow loses its magic.

Autumn Babe said...

if you have a shotgun marriage, hope the girl is your miss right. then, no more follow up problems. let me be the godmum. hahahhahaha

angeliCassie said...

woot woot i love this post..makes me think..and ermm..somemore coming from a guy..=)

all the best nyehe

p/s:here's the link to the answers you helped me with the other day http://youthecho.com/nuffnangs-co-founder/ thanks once again

Simon Seow said...

Someone like Banana?

Sara said...

like ur entry...=D!

*huiqi~ said...

I think you'll know & feel it when it's time for marriage. I used to brush away marriage thoughts when people mentioned it to me. But now, I am looking forward to my wedding day in dec! =)

Nik Faris said...

I have to agree with your opinion on getting married.

.:Baby Gin:. said...

cough hack cough

Jeffro said...

Hmm.. I believe it should come naturally.. When both the girl and you are ready for it, why not? Heck, just buy a ring, flowers, chocs, and sign the paper.. ^_^

I wish you luck in finding the one you will cherish the most.. But don't let me see her first, coz she'll be mine then! LOL!

Violet Voon said...

Maybe you are right, if you get married next year and be somebody's daddy at the age of 26, I guess your children's friends will envy them, thinking...

"His dad is so young, unlike...ermmm, looked like an uncle"

:P

Boss Stewie said...

Solitary: ahh… so you mean like.. MARRY ON IMPULSE!!!... well okay not quite that but I get your drift

Autumn: hahahaha okok I shall start an application for Godmum when I have my first kid

Angeli: hahaha thank you angeli, :P

Simon: Hahah!

Sara: thank u :P

Huiqi: ohh you’re getting married in Dec? Congratulations

Nik: Thank you :P

Baby: what what???

Jeffro: hahahaha no!! mine!!!!


Violet: yeah! Hahahaha then when my son becomes a young adult, I won’t be too old to have a generation gap.

Ohkulala said...

well, i truly believe in the saying behind every man is a successful woman. though in my family, we say beside every man is an equally successful woman. because marriage is such, you grow and develop together. the love you share and the support you have over one another through thick and thin is what makes marriages so scared and special unlike any other relationship. so if you're ready, take the leap into your next phase in life!

electronicfly said...

/me waits for news that Boss popped the question.

RealGunners said...

banana seems to fit perfectly into the profile wat...

kuiseong said...

Tim, how old are you again? How come sound like Uncle? heheh... hawt is still important

GreenKaeru said...

nice entry.. it is true, looks may not be the main criteria. What's important? The inner quality of a person, and the understanding between 2 person because you will be spending the rest of your life with your partner. Looks, beauty will not be the same anymore when you grow old. Somehow getting married early makes me nervous ...Getting married means more commitments more responsibilities... Gotta really think about that... 24 is still way too young to think about marriage.. im about your age thou .. =P

Boss Stewie said...

ohkuala: hey you meant to say *sacred rite?.. Great I shall be ready!

electronic: oi.. pls lar

realgunners: hahaha !

kuiseong: hahaha I'm 24!!! Hah!!! funny lar u

green: nooo that's the thing i'm trying to say... I don't think I'm too old to think about getting married, heck so many of my friends already are married

pamsong said...

I love this post. And yes, I agree that if you've found the one, why wait? But it isn't always that simple.

Sure, if you've got financial stability and all that, it's fine. And yeah, if you don't, then struggle through the hardship together as husband and wife. In sickness and in health; in riches and in poverty.

But like many of your friends, a lot of people out there think that marriage at a young age is bad. Like it's blasphemy talking about it. Especially when it comes to the guys. The whole 'why-you-tie-yourself-down???' talk comes up. A little unfair, don't you think when in actual fact, you men just enjoy having your woman at home while those women you call your wives take on added responsibilities to care for the home. No longer are men the sole breadwinners. So it's not like a woman handles the house stuff and the men handle the finances already. We BOTH work for money. But in most (not all) cases, the household chores are not shared. So... for a woman, marrying is like taking on added responsibilities. To me, it's the GUY who is at an advantage when it comes to getting married.

But then, that's me.

Once again, good post. Me likes. =)

Knight said...

Happen to jump into your blog..

That's a nice post..Hmm..but I wonder if girls feel the same way that we lost our freedom after marriage. Two type of characteristics. Guy love to have extreme fun = freedom. Girls wan find someone to attach and bother them around.

ermm..just mostly, not all females.

Jannah said...

I thought Banana in Singapore? We talking about the same one here or what?

Boss, you don't play play while she's away now :p

On a serious note, there are other issues to deal with if you're serious about marriage. Like money matters, would you want a stay at home wife or don't mind a working one? And then if love is blind and you fall for a woman of a different race or religion, who will follow whom and what not.

Plus the whole, why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free.

You're 24. You should at least have 24 exes under your belt before even thinking of settling down. If not gonna regret not chasing after that beauty queen/supermodel/hollywood bollywood actress/one of the Princesses from Monaco etc.

Although you can't predict what might come your way.

Summer, Autumn, Winter, Spring, Oh when is my next fling?

Daryl Teo said...

Heck Stevie,

If u find the girl of your dreams fitting all the above description u gave, pls ask on my behalf if she has a sister. We could always go tandem! LOLZ!

Nur Sarah Lam said...

Hey Boss Stewie,
Been reading so many of your posts but I think this would be my first comment. I would say that you don't have to wait for the right time to get married because there is simply no right time (or wrong time).

Michael Song said...

wat somore? go n propose lar... we gonna receive another email fr nuffnang team inviting us for ur wedding party. how bout it? sammy must b happy to read this posting...

Melissa said...

I don't check your blog often, but every time I do, I see my pic or you talking about me. (or referring to me)

Anyway, I just wanted to say marriage is the best thing that could happen in one's life. (Of course the ultimate best thing would be when you see your baby in a pair of green dungarees) The feeling is indescribable. Doesn't matter what age you tie the knot as long as you love that person and get on like a house on fire. People often ask me how do I know he's the one. Believe me, you'll know! I hope you find your perfect girl one day.

xoxo
Melissa

Ricci's Chica said...

Well, Tim..im not married yet but im seeing a great guy who has been gud frens with me for the past 10 years and got in r/ship 1 1/2 yrs alredy. i trust on de institution of marriage is de whre u hv reach the level of able to compromise and live with each others weaknesses and support your partner to be more stronger. financially we hv to be stable , but like wat u say, r/ship is more about how mch u stand by your partner thru thick & thin. r/ship & marriage is not for de convenience or security, but its maturity of a two people living as one. i choose to be wif him despite all de things i may go thru. i need him, becos i love ALL of him and not tat i love him becos i need him. r/ship is all abt sharing and not being selfish.
enjoy the beauty of marriage & love. gud luck in your search of your true love!

Boss Stewie said...

pamsong: i like that line.. "In sickness and in health; in riches and in poverty." So when are you geting married?

knight: hahahaha maybe 'bother them around' is a bit too extreme a line to use lah.. but i get your drift

jannah: hahahaha yes i should have 24 ex's.. unfortunately i'm far behind that target now sniff

daryl: hahaha ok i'll be sure to ask

nur: yay! thakn u

michael: hahahahaha pls ler dude

melissa: aihh damn pai seh.. you're not supposed to read my blog!!! :P

ricci: haih lucky you in finding him!

pamsong said...

Haha. Not anytime soon, Tim. You go first. My boy's a laggard. Not doing anything. It's up to you to save your kind now.

that girl said...

I WANNA GET MARRIED TOO BOSS!

NN got marriage incentive not. HAHAHA

-Cherie

Cheng Chun said...

Need to get a feel of couple-hood first before I can think further. Poor me.

Is there a reception any time soon Boss? :P

Cheng Chun said...

Need to get a feel of couple-hood first before I can think further. Poor me.

Is there a reception any time soon Boss? :P

Anselm said...

i am not sure how many commentors here are married or have started a family thru marriage.

but seriously, if u are already married and esp those who are already with a family, value their opinions more as opposed to those "smart one's" with so-called "wise" advice.

everyone will go thru what u are going thru. not u alone but everyone. if that someone doest go thru it, then i guess there is something very wrong with him or her..

i am married and i have 2 kids... so i am just going to put it very plain and simple...

when u are unattached (as in married) you basically hv to only think of urself - not being selfishly thinking abt urself but u practically dont hv commitments. what commitment can u basically hv now and i am talking about commitments that tie u down from all aspects of life - that is your wife and family...

commitments like paying for a car, a house and whatever physicality are totally immaterial in this case - so this is not accounted for..

when u are married, u have to think of ur wife, even when u fart... let alone say go out to hv fun..

when u hv kids, u have to think not only about ur wife but ur kids and ur family... do u think u will hv time for urself? if yes how much of time will u hv for urself? let's not account work as ur personal time again...

financial stability grows proportionate with ur career. if u build ur career ur finances grow (assuming that one knows how to manage one's finances)...

the question in effect is where do u want to stop growing ur career and at what level you plan to take it slow or sustain at that level? it comes a time when u will play an important role in ur family - i am talking about sustaining ur relationship with ur wife and kids, ensuring the family is a family and not for formality sake... all these u will begin to experience them when u actually come face to face with it..

marriage is a very huge picture by itself.. you cannot just finish looking at it by 1 look... let alone say imagine...

i tend to look at it at a very simplistic manner until i married at the age of 29... and at the age of 29 i thought i was ready until the day actually realized.. it was hell then... it was totally a huge phase shift from being single unattach to being married and later on a father... all 3 very different phases..

my parents back then asked me if i was truly ready... hey, they spoke thru experience, i spoke thru naivety and arrogance... i wanted to proof them wrong but it was the otherwise...

Danny Foo said...

Tim, don't tell me you're going through a mid-life crisis now. ROFL!

p.s: Think of the older people. LOL!

Anselm said...

oh... the other thing is that - i am talking from a man's perspective.

if get woman's advice (sorry ladies but i am not being a chauvinist pig), they can only think of their babies and kids...

there is 1 std problem.. note i used the word standard (std)... ladies will always say they wanna get married and not hv kids... but the moment they are pregnant and when the day they deliver, they will love their kids to the point that they can even stop loving their husbands... trust me... u can even notice some of the comments in this article...

anyways, my mum used to tell me... i regret not listening to her...

play all you want and have all the fun you can until your dick drops dead, then decide on marrying wont be too late a decision! Man dont grow old when they are in their 30s. They look more matured, vibrant, distinguished, handsome, etc...

Dont trust me? Wait until u are that age... then come back and look for me...

ahlost said...

Interesting post. I want to marry too, but no one propose to me. I'm thinking of proposing to him instead *LOL*

Winn said...

this is an interesting entry..

i think ppl nowadays think marriage is a burden hence stress!!!.

our parents days: love/marriage comes 1st, money(financial stability 2nd)

us and now: financial stablity must come 1st, then only love/marriage.

ppl now are insecure.

shinyin_jocelyn said...

now, your blog just made me feel old... :(
thinking of marraige at 24? hmm.. isn't that still a little too early? please say it is, and i'll feel young again :P

Myrtlevenz said...

hey boss... were u at the gardens, mv just now at around 9pm ? thought i saw u or was it ur lookalike... :S

wishfulfairy said...

There are no right age for marriage.

What matters is your mentally and financially ready.

I'm 24, for all i know I'm happily married with 2 kids.

Whether you like it or not, you will fall for a girl who is somehow like your MOM but in sexy way.

My 2 cents worth...

Boss Stewie said...

Pamsong: ahahahah lol lol.. okay maybe you should get him to hang out with me more often and maybe I’ll rub off some of my vibes to him

That girl: hahahaha! Pls lar.. no marriage incentive! The Singapore govt already gives you enough of that

Cheng: pls lar.. dun haf ler
Anselm: really? I thought most wives would understand if their husband had to fart when they’re around. But thanks for the great long and insightful comment man. If you say you were naïve too when 29, gosh when is it ready then? And are you encouraging me to play around…? Hahahaha!!!

Danny: NO LAH dude
Ahlos: hahahaha lol good luck with that. Or you could just hint
Winn: aih… well I’m sure at some point, it would feel worth it
Shin: okokok.. fine fine fine… it’s too early@! Do u feel young again?
Myrtl: hey… yeah that was me :P Why didn’t you say HI

Wishfulfair: Wow 24 and with two kids? When did you get married?

Stella said...

I want to get married too! Why isn't there anyone who wants to marry me? :(

Zephyr said...

"Shakes hand with you with tears of joy"
XD

I'm totally agreed with you. You are da man!!! I'm thinking abt da same too

Anyway, at least you have involved in relationships before, which I don't.

It's almost to be considered a miracle to find a girl with internal beauty rather than juz having da bungkusan nowadays. Can compare to buying 4D.

p/s: didn't know that you're so young, juz a year older than me.

Yling said...

I am married and I totally agree with you. My husband and I had gone through so much together that I just love him more and more each day. He is the reason I wake up every morning!

Anselm said...

aiyo boss stew, i know u understand what i m saying la... but then just to reiterate that even the least of things that u do, u still have to put ur wife and family as priority.. u cant displace them for not even 1 second.. surely ppl of today displace their wives and children more often than not, but that is a separate issue, it depends solely on the wife or the husband's tolerance and acceptance level.. but doing that often enough will get u into trouble...

well u read my msg clear enough.. 29 was the age i thot i was ready... 1 year later i got a kid, so everything didnt fall into its place accordingly and that is why i said it was hell...

when u come by around 27/28, u will start to understand what i am saying... but make sure u are still single (tho u can be attached) by then...

and finally, have fun, enjoy until the day u dont want to enjoy no more... it wont be too late to get married yet by then...

Myrtlevenz said...

erm... i have a good explanation? u were going up the escalator while i was waiting for the elevator to go down. haha! maybe next time. ;p

pamsong said...

Haha. I seriously think need lor, dammit. Haha.

So when you getting married? =p

-zonked` said...

Whoa, this is like different perspectives compiled in one post.

I guess I am in the 'teen' age where marriage still feels very far away. :(

ANYWAY, you're looking for a marketing assistant? what are YOUR requirements like? :)

SueSue said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
SueSue said...

Funny how I could relate so well to this article. What's even more fascinating was that it was written by a male. Looks like there is one thing after all that doesn't put women from Venus and men from Mars :) Then again, this is just an individual's perspective.

I have the exact same questions and sentiments regarding relationships. As for me, I've always downplayed it and never committed myself to a relationship before because I had always thought I was too young, I didn't want to be tied down, neither did I want it to interfere with my studies.
But I make sure I never give false hope to any guy hence I always made it clear from the beginning that we're close friends as of the moment.
Now that I'm almost 21 and almost a doctor- I cannot use the same excuse of not wanting distractions affecting my studies, being too young etc…
There are times when I do wish I have someone to travel with, someone to watch a romantic comedy with instead of girlfriends or someone to share special moments with- I mean, I can- but then again, I want it to be with the right person.

And I have had this conversation over and over again - and I'll leave it to fate.
If it's meant to be, it's meant to be. And the right one will come along when the time is right. Call me cliche, but that, I believe :)

Anna T said...

boss dont get married so young.
i'll be heart broken >.<

Hannah said...

wow 71 comments! But I'm adding one anyway. Tell you what, I've been Idealistic when I was still studying. Now, I'm in the real world and my views have changed about marriage. After a bad break-up I seriously don't want to get married yet. I have a boyfriend now who loves me so much and is talking about marriag... I don't know why but I feel something is missing.. This is a sweatcase 1! But reading your post somehow made me regain my faith back into marriage.

Cheers!

Missyve said...

Kids are horrible.

I'm too selfish to spend/save any money at all for "my children".

I even pity my mom for having me at times. I'm a very selfish person.
Well, sometimes.

Hee, maybe my perspective will change when im 16 or 18 or SMTH.

I'd rather self-indulge than waste money on prolonging my family line.

Pfft. What for. Marriage is a beautiful thing without brats!