There has been plenty of publicity on the recent opening of Penang's Rasa Sayang Resort after its years of renovation.
The renovation bill came up to RM100 million but I guess that is small money to Robert Kuok, Malaysia's Richest Man and owner of the resort.
The new Rasa Sayang is supposed to be a very very posh hotel, a lot more posh than the ALREADY posh old one.The cheapest room in the newly renovated Rasa Sayang costs almost RM1,000 a night (during peak season that'll probably be more).
RM1,000 a night is something few people could afford.
So I do what most Penang people do.
Find a reason to go to the hotel (like have lunch there) and have a tour of the hotel after that.
So last weekend, I went for lunch at Rasa Sayang.
A lunch that costed all of us almost RM90 per head.
Then we spent the rest of the day walking around the hotel pretending to be hotel guests.
We had our buffett lunch at one of the two restaurants at the hotel called the Spice Market.
Now I don't fancy blogging about food so I'm just going to say that I had some of the usual stuff like this
and A LOT of SASHIMI to get my money's worth.
Yes... the kiasu attitude at its best.
I had so many plates of Sashimi that the guy serving it was very close to saying
"Bang... cukup lar... kalau makan lagi nanti restoran tutup saya juga takde kerja lar!".
So I had my last plate of Sashimi and went for every fat man's favourite course of the meal....
But I skipped most of the cakes, kuih and usual stuff and went straight for the... CHOCOLATE FONDUE!!!
I had so many marshmallows dipped in chocolate it wasn't even funny.
So after my lunch I walked around the hotel with my hands in my pockets pretending to be a hotel guest and feeling very good about myself.Confucius say, man with hand in pocket feel cocky all day long.
And cocky I was.
Everything in the hotel was so nice and proper.
Everything was in order.
Even the sitting areas like this...
All the chairs and tables were so aligned that it's almost as if nobody has ever sat on them before (either that or they were all nailed to the ground so nobody could move em).
And even the landscape was to die for.
It almost looked as if Heaven was on the other side of the hotel.
I walked a little further and I came across the swimming pool that had the most unique shape ever.
And somewhere in the middle of that, two guys were playing ping pong.I went up to one of them looking like I belonged in the hotel and said
"Hey how you doing... you staying here?? YEAH.. SO AM I... I'm in room 112...".
After making everyone ELSE think that I could "really" afford to stay in a hotel like that, I moved on.
A little ahead of the pool was a nice sitting area and a little ahead of that was.... THE BEACH!!!
Ok that is one thing that I like about Penang in which London and KL does not have:
NICEEE SANDY BEACHES.
And NO ... little sandboxes with a puddle of rainwater beside it in your KL kindergartens do NOT count as BEACHES.
Having most of my attention focused on the beach, it wasn't long before I lost my way around the resort but I came across a signboard that pointed to the all famous Rasa Sayang Spa called Chi!I have heard plenty about this Spa.
I've heard that just a simple massage and spa treatment there would cost you easily at least RM300-RM400.
Now I know what people like Wingz might be thinking
"Aiyah RM300-RM400... if char bor sui then worth it lar!".
But I assure you that when this hotel says "massage" they LITERALLY MEAN "massage" on your back, your neck, your feet, hands and everywhere else but your kotek.So don't expect any of the staff from the spa to come up to you and say
"Sucky Sucky Five Dollah?"
DON'T!!! DON'T EVEN THINK ABOUT IT!!!
(unless of course you like your kotek pepper sprayed... then please do)
Anyway, soon enough, my tour of the hotel had to end.
And I had to go back to my old "unposh" life of being Boss Stewie.
The signboard at the carpark on my way out read"Exit to Batu Feringgi Road"But it might as well have read
"Poor people walk this way".
Now some people might leave the resort saying
"I wish one day I'll be able to stay in a hotel like this".
But I don't like to just dream. I like to chase the dream.
So I left thinking
"How many coke cans would I have to collect to stay in a hotel like this..."