Saturday, April 28, 2007

South Park's Wheel of Fortune

It AMAZES me how Southpark manages to get away with jokes like this.

Check it out.





Okay... now after watching the video... be honest and tell me...

HOW MANY OF YOU MADE THE SAME MISTAKE?!

This episode even made it on to CNN.



Friday, April 27, 2007

Something For The Penangites To Do

A friend of one of my readers Daphne recently e-mailed me to spread the word about a play she's doing, asking if I could help her spread the word and the answer I gave her was... SURE.

She was quick to ask if she had to pay me for it... but nahhh... if there's anything I could do to help any of my readers (or friends of my readers) I'd be more than happy to do it for free as long as its still under control.

Anyway, here's information of the play.


---------------------------------


The Oral Stage enters its fourth season with an all-new line-up of original shorts and monologues, a contemporary take on the timeless issues of identity, gender, relationships, meaning and purpose.

Screwed reinforces the fact that being human is nothing short of being screwed, after all. This season's ensemble stars Waimin Lee, Emily Yoon, Doreen Loo, Gary Ooi, Branavan Aruljothi, Christine Ellis, Prakash Gopalakrishnan, Lam Wai Yee, Zalikha Harun, Erin Victor, Nick Davis, Rachel Lai MS and Elza Irdalynna.
Directed by Kelvin Wong and produced by Christine Ellis. Pieces written by Joyce Hooi, Gary Ooi, Davina Goh, Priya K., Gavin Yap, Patricia Low, Doreen Loo, Kelvin Wong and Rauf Fadzilla. Supported by The Dram Projects, KLPac and The Actors Studio.

After a successful weekend in KLPAC, Screwed will be staged in Penang!

May 4th 2007 @ 8.30 pm May 5th 2007 @ 3.00 pm & 8.30 pm May 6th 2007 @ 3.00 pm

The Actors Studio Greenhall, Penang
Ground Floor, Zhong Zheng School Memorial Centre 32,
Lebuh Light, 10200 Penang

Tickets @ TAS Greenhall, Penang RM25 (Adults) RM15 (Students, senior citizens & the disabled) Ticket Contact
TAS Greenhall @ 04-2635400

For more info - visit http://theoralstage.blogspot.com

Now go go go for it!

And stop reading about my scout log book!


Wednesday, April 25, 2007

Boss Stewie's Scout Log Book

When I was in Primary School, I was a cub scout.... and a DAMN PROUD ONE AT IT TOO.

Being a cub scout is the most innocent fun you can ever have in your life.

All that fun ends when you become a scout in Secondary School because if you're not too busy marching in the hot sun, you're chasing girl guides at every Scout Gathering you attend.

But being a cub scout... all you know is... make yourself a nice log book, colour it nice nice with colour pencils... and earn your badges.

I actually went quite far as a cub scout... far enough to get one of those things you sling around your arm... called a Rambu or something.

AND BEHOLD... FOR THE FIRST TIME EVER.. I AM REVEALING MY SECRET SCOUT LOG BOOK TO THE WORLD!!!

(Note: I was in Standard 3 when I did this okay so don't be a bitch!).

If you're wondering the cover is all about, it basically shows a scout camping by the river.

And when you open up the book and lay it upside down you will see...

JENG JENG JENG!!! THE FULL PICTURE OF THE CAMPSITE!!!
I am such a arteeest... I should've went to Lim Kok Wing.

Ok let's explore the inside.

Now as a cub scout... we have to show how much we lurveee our State and Country so to prove that.. I drew our National Flag and even the Penang State Flag.

Looks very much like the actual flags huh... I know.. I'm quite a good arteestt...
Then can anyone guess what THIS IS?!?!


That my friend... is what I thought Penang Island looked like when I was a cub scout.

Not too far away from how Penang Island actually looks right?

I know... I am an ARTEEST.

As a cub scout in my school, the scout master thought it would be cool if we followed the lessons of the Jungle Book.

So part of our assignments were to draw pictures of Jungle Book Characters.

It's not easy drawing LIVE animals... but since I was such an ARTEEST, I jumped at the challenge.

This is a picture of Bagheera, the jaguar in Jungle Book.


And of Kathi, the elephant...


Then there's the easiest... the SNAKE!!!
This is a picture of the MONKEY in Jungle Book.
AND WHO CAN GUESS WHAT THIS IS?!?!!


That is a picture of a ___________________ (Fill in the blank).

Finally, as a scout, we must not only love our country.. but love our KING!

So part of my assignment was to draw this.


Taat Kepada Raja Dan Negara!

And to further prove my worth as a cub scout, I drew a picture of me doing THIS.
Just to be clear... that is supposed to be a picture of me doing the Scout's Honour and NOT SHOWING SOMEONE THE MIDDLE FINGER!!!

I know... I was such a l337 Arteeeesttt..

That's why when I told my mum that I was considering going into art college, she said
"Son.. how about you study Economics and become a businessman instead?"

Then I said

"But MUUUUUUMMMMMM......"

And she said
"SON!!! TRUST ME ON THIS... JUST DO AS I SAY AND STAY AWAY FROM ART!!!"


Monday, April 23, 2007

MyEG Services, a Pioneer in Blog Advertising

When you're running an internet startup like Nuffnang, you're bound to have a lot of ups and downs.

The downs come when you find out you've made a mistake somewhere and find it in yourself somewhere to pick yourself up to fix it.
The ups come at the times when you know you've done something right or achieved something that you've always dreamed of.

One of my dreams was to one day have a massive advertising campaign that runs on print media, television and/or radio... and also on Nuffnang Blogs.

Such a moment came to me just recently.

Just a week or two ago, I remember driving on the roads listening to Mix FM when I suddenly heard a radio ad that caught my attention and made me smile.

It was an ad for MyEG, a new website that allows us to do everything from checking and paying police summons, pay fines and/or DBKL assessment and compounds.

Most importantly, it finally allows us to renew our driver's license ONLINE. Something I will definitely be using the next time I seek a renewal.

Gone are the days where you have to wake up early in the morning just to go queue up to have your license renewed.

Now the particular attachment that I share with MyEG is that it's the first time Nuffnang blogs have been involved in a multi-prong marketing campaign alongside other forms of traditional media.

Massive advertising campaigns traditionally cover everything from television, print media, radio... and now we can start to say... blogs too... not just one blog... hundreds of them.

I owe this to James of Mantra, and to MyEG for giving us the opportunity.

So to my dear readers... please support our advertiser by clicking on the MyEG ad right after this post.

Check out their website, sign up and bookmark it. You're going to need it sooner or later... I know I will.

If you'd like to hear the radio ad I heard in the car that day... here it is.







Friday, April 20, 2007

When Kopitiams Are Beginning To Lose It

Yee Hou came to Penang to visit not too long ago and I managed to find some time to meet up with him for breakfast.

To all of you guys who don't know, Penangnites don't have scrambled eggs & toast for breakfast.

We go to COFFEE SHOPS like this.
Where we have all sorts of people there that eat food like THIS.

With people from KL like THIS

Now let me tell you a bit about us Penang people.

Whenever I tell people that I'm from Penang they go "Wah Penang people damn kiam siap wan (stingy)".

I always defended my people.

WE ARE NOT KIAM SIAP!!!! NO NO NOT AT ALL!!!

The same thing I was trying to drum into Yee Hou's head and it all was fine and rosy until I saw this sign.

"WILL CHARGE RM0.30 PER PERSON FOR THOSE NOT ORDERING DRINKS... THANK YOU!"

BLARRDY HELL..

SUMMORE DARE TO SAY "THANK YOU!" AT THE END OF THE NOTE.

I personally feel that is too much already! I mean, if I were to go to Coffee Bean with 10 friends and sit on a table with only one friend ordering a drink (while the rest drink water).... then fine... go ahead and charge me that 30 sen.

But I'm at a KOPITIAM.

No air-con, no nice chairs to sit on, no coffee table to put handphone and look cool and hardly any chicks like this to look at.

AND THEY WANT TO CHARGE ME 30 SEN IF I DON'T ORDER A DRINK?!?!

It's just gonna be a matter of time before I walk into a kopitiam and see a sign like this.

Shame on you and YOUR LOUSY KIAM SIAP KOPITIAM!!!

PS: Eh Linsey, Leon, Matt, Rayvin.... wanna go there for breakfast tomorrow?

Wednesday, April 18, 2007

The Blogger Choice Awards

Apparently Shireen nominated my tiny blog for the Best Business Blog category in the Blogger's Choice Awards.

I'm flattered Shireen.

Thanks very much, though I was a little embarrassed when she first told me about it since... who the hell would vote for my blog.

But I checked in today and I surprisingly found 7 votes!

To the 7 of you who voted, thank you very much... but I'm not much of a blogging award kind of person.

The joys I get from blogging are far from any recognition I get for the things I write on this blog.

I love blogging not because of any fame or money that I could potentially earn, but because it gives me a private space to share my thoughts, views and experiences with the most wonderful and responsive readers that any blogger could ever ask for.

If that doesn't make me lucky enough, the list keeps growing with hilarious readers joining in on the comments like Hor Ny who consistently makes me laugh with his replies.. and Giovoni who seems to be this very mysterious Fortune Teller that keeps advising me on what to expect next (there are so many more of you out there that I didn't manage to name but that doesn't mean you're any less important).


That to me... is far from what any award can ever bring me.

So instead of voting for someone like me... go support Kid Chan and vote for him. The man deserves to win.

They did give me this thing to place on my blog's sidebar though.

To tell everyone that this blog got nominated....

My site was nominated for Best Business Blog!

But I think I'll pass.

On another note...

Check out Shireen's blog.

She apparently broke the Nuffnang Da Vinci Code.

LOL Shireen.

Sorry I wasn't able to reply your MSN messages that night Shireen. I've been so swamped with work it's not even funny.


Tuesday, April 17, 2007

How Creative a Conman Can You Be? (Part 2)

Okay you guys came out with such creative answers to the last question, that it makes the story I have look like crap.

If you haven't read the creative ideas my dear readers came up with to sell this stupid piece of plastic, then please click here to view the previous post and read the comments.

Okay, here's the answer.

This stupid piece of plastic that I'm holding here is supposed to be.....

*Drum roll please*

A SCREEN FILTER... A STUPID SCREEN FILTER THAT COSTS RM25.

Now screen filters are meant to be placed on your computer monitor to reduce glare and radiation.

Of course, there is no real way for you to naturally tell whether it really reduces radiation or not (unless you carry one of those FBI devices or unless you're Mighty Mouse).


But you can see if it reduces glare or not... and if it does.. by how much.

So I ran a little test.

Before..
AFTER


See any difference?

THERE IS NO DIFFERENCE (or at least not much of a difference).

Then I decided to cover half the screen with the "filter" to have a more face to face comparison on whether the "filter" brings any value at all.

So I took this picture (Notice half the "filter" is on the left half of the screen).


Do you see a difference?

Not much apart from the fact that there's a stupid piece of plastic in front of the monitor.

Think about it, if each of these pieces of plastic costs 50 sen, and you can sell it for RM25, you make 50 times the amount you put in.

So if you sell a hundred pieces of this. it will cost you RM50 for all the plastic.

And you the amount of money you can earn when you sell it turns out to be... RM2,500.

What a brilliant idea this is.

Of course the next step would be to find someone who would believe your story and buy it.

In this case... that someone was....

MY DEAR SISTER!!!

I was walking around my home a few days ago when I suddenly heard my sister shout to herself when she was sitting in front of the computer

"F*CKING HELL!!! KENA CHEATED!!!!".

I went over to find out what happened and she told me the whole story.

She went to look for a screen filter at this shop in Penang. She had a good idea what screen filters look like since her college had those hung from the top of their monitors and it really reduced glare and the strain on her eyes.

So one afternoon she walked into a shop confidently and asked for a screen filter.

The salesman at the shop took out this stupid piece of plastic and showed it to her
"This is our best screen filter... it costs RM25 and it's super thin, doesn't make your monitor look ugly.. you won't even know it's there". (He was right about this... you really wouldn't know if it was there or not)

But my sister was suspicious at first.

She said
"Eh??? I thought screen filter is much bigger than this and hangs from the top of the monitor?"

The salesman said
"Oh no ... don't worry.. that wan is for CRT monitors, this one is for LCD monitors... this one better".

So my sister believed him, bought the "filter" and went home.

The minute her feet touched the warm wooden floor of home, she ran to her computer and placed the "filter" there
only to find that... IT DOESN'T EVEN STICK ON TO THE SCREEN!!!!

That's when she yelled
"F*CKING HELL!!!!! KENA CHEATED!!!!".

That's when I came over only to see her in front of the computer surfing the net with one hand and holding the "filter" to the monitor with the other.

So there you go everyone, the conman wins again.

Now we don't know what to do with the stupid piece of plastic. Anyone have an idea?

Maybe we'll start wearing it like this... start a new trend.

It won't be long before the teenagers at school start saying
"DUDE... I GOTTA GET MYSELF A STUPID PIECE OF PLASTIC... I SAW MY BROTHER WEARING IT AND IT IS SOOO COOOL DUDEEE".

PS: Some people might actually know something that I don't... that this stupid piece of plastic actually works! Please enlighten me if that's true... and tell me how I could test it or at least find a way to see the difference.

Sunday, April 15, 2007

How Creative a Conman Can You Be? (Part 1)

Okay I'm going to show all of you something.

Take a look at this piece of transparent square plastic I am holding up.This piece of plastic probably costs 50 sen at most. Probably even less.

Now the question is this.

If I gave you this piece of plastic, what would you try to sell it as to make the most money as you can out of it?

The reason I'm asking all of you this question is because I have a brilliant answer to that which I will reveal within the next two days.. HAHAHA.

Okay... so tell me what you'll sell it as, and realistic suggestions only please.

Don't say "I will sell it as a time machine!"...

It has to be something that an average person would at least consider buying.


Saturday, April 14, 2007

WE RAN OUT OF CHEEEZELS!!!!

WE RAN OUT OF CHEEZELS!!!

Just so you all know, Cheezels is to Nuffnang what Petrol is to Cars.

Without Cheezels... Nuffnang just doesn't have the strength to move on.

This week has been a rather stressful week for all of us at Nuffnang having had to work in the office till the wee hours of the morning and wake up the next day to make it in time for some meetings.

But we all kept our motivation.... because of our Cheezels!!!


So you can imagine my horrid after I got a call from one of my colleagues the other day saying that we ran out of Cheezels.

Ming and I had to rush to Tescos in the midst of our hectic day to stock up on our supply of CHEEZELS.

We chucked in packets of Cheezels like there was going to be no tomorrow.

And Nuffnang is saved again.
WOOHOO!!!

Now we can all go back to work.

Thursday, April 12, 2007

Nuffnang Among Top Technorati Searches

I just walked into the office a while ago, turned on my computer and received over 30 e-mails that were sent in the last 12 hours.

E-mail from clients, potential clients and bloggers.

Yet, the knee-jerk reaction for me is to always look at what bloggers e-mail me about.

Then an e-mail from James Yeang of Friedbeef.com caught my attention.

The e-mail titled
"Wow you guys are on the top searches list on technorati now"

And on it was this link
http://technorati.com/pop/
With my eyes still blurry after the late night I had, I checked out the link only to find that it's true!

Nuffnang is among the Top Searches on Technorati.

The pressure on us to perform rises since I'd imagine people's expectations of Nuffnang are bound to rise.

Thank you guys again for all your support including those of you who're searching Nuffnang on Technorati every day to see what good (or bad) things people write about us.

Now it's time for me to get back to work. So much to do... so many bloggers to satisfy...

Wednesday, April 11, 2007

Boss Stewie is a Murderer

If you're wondering why I haven't updated in two days... it's because I've been in shock.

Just two days ago I was a happy Stewie.

I jumped out of the bed in the morning, sang Whitney Houston's "I Will Always Love You" in the shower, and had corn beef with bread for breakfast.


I was a Happy Stewie!

Happy Stewie then jumped into his car in the morning with Ming and Jazz (another Nuffnang team member), and we drove off to work.

I was driving down the road of a nice quite suburb. Ming and I were debating issues as usual when suddenly I saw a flock of birds from the side of the road take off and fly across my car.

I nearly hit all of them with my car... but I did hit ONE.

"POOF", I heard the sound of a bird reflect off the bonnet of my car.

As it impacted the front of my car in mid-air, it suddenly dropped dead towards the side of the road.

Ming shouted in response "F*CK DUDE... DID YOU JUST KILL A BIRD?"

Boss Stewie is a murderer :(

Please forgive me oh leetle birdy... Please don't come back to haunt me...

Monday, April 09, 2007

Apparently Boss Stewie is HOT

Aunty Lilian recently sent me an e-mail saying that she was doing this "Hottest Male Blogger" contest on her blog.

She asked me to answer some questions and to pick a photo of myself.

I decided that I could of course pick one of those gaya looking photos where I'm posing with sunglasses, looking into the sky wtih wind blowing against my hair.

But nooo... I instead gave her THIS picture.
What in the world was I high on when I did that...?

Anyway let me tell you who's going to win.

Sapiensbryan is going to win!

Let me tell you why.

Beauty is relative.

For example, you put an ugly guy next to an even uglier guy, the ugly guys looks like Brad Pitt.

But you put an ugly guy next to Brad Pitt, and Brad Pitt looks like he was made in Heaven.

Allow me to illustrate.

This is a picture of Ming and I.


I don't look too bad right? (Ming: HAHAHAHAHAHAA).

Now this is a picture of SapiensBryan and I.

Now be honest with me... at first glance.. did ANY of you girls out there EVEN notice the guy in the white shirt?

NO RIGHT??? And even if you did... you were thinking

"WHAT THE HELL WAS BRYAN STANDING NEXT TO?!?!"


PS: Check out Lilian's post on the Hottest Blogger awards.

Keep up to date with her blog to see my prophecy come true!!! Bwahahah Sapiensbryan will win....

Friday, April 06, 2007

Cybercafe Stories

Ahhh cybercafes....

Where I wasted soo much of my life.

I used to spend almost 10 hours each day in a cybercafe playing Counterstrike back when it was still very very new (Beta 3).

It was ridiculous! If I had spent 1/10th of that time doing something productive like read a book, I would be a much better man today.

I was talking to a friend of mine and we started talking about funny things we're heard happen in Cybercafes.


Story 1

This actually happened in my college library many years ago. You know how college libraries these days come fully equipped with the best computers you can find for students to do research on.

Once I was studying in the library and I saw a rather peculiar guy consistently refreshing his Hotmail mailbox. Wondering what the heck he was doing, I peered closer only to find that he actually had a little browser window opened.

And in that little browser window on the right corner of his screen, was a picture of a naked girl.. or at least a quarter of a picture of a naked girl like this.

The dude was surfing porn, but he was too shy to open the entire browser window, so he decided to instead open a small window to view part of a picture.

Then scroll up down (and left right) to slowly see the rest.


The poor poor dudeeeee....

Story 2

Some guys were playing Counterstrike in a cybercafe. You know how cybercafes are, noisy, smokey and full of guys cursing
"NIAMA!!! WHAT A FAKE SHOT!!!".

Then somewhere in the midst of a high pressured Counterstrike game, a 15-year old boy managed to sneak up behind his opponent (in the game) and knife the opponent to death.

The gangster-looking person playing the opponent on the other side of the cybercafe shouted
"BASTARD YOU!!! BELAKANG MARI!!! NO SKILL AR?!?!?"

The 15-year old boy laughed
"AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA YOU LAH DIN SEE ME COMING... YOU NOOOB!!!!!".

The gangster dude then got up from his seat and walked towards the boy who was busy playing away on the next round.

The gangster took out a REAL KNIFE... and stabbed the kid in the back.
Then he laughed
"HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!! YOU DIN SEE ME COMING!!! YOU NOOOB!!! KENA BELAKANG MARI!!!"

I think he got arrested after that but I'm not sure.

Story 3

This is my favourite story of all the ones I've heard, which actually happened to a friend of a friend.

Again because of a very high-pressured game of Counterstrike late one night, a few guys got up from their seats and started shouting at each other, calling each other cheaters.
Then one of them said
"OKAY!!! COME WE SETTLE OUTSIDE".

And they all went outside the cybercafe to fight it out.

It didn't take long before the police arrived and broke up the fight.

But the funny thing is this.

When the police arrived, they walked into the cybercafe and saw everyone playing away at their computers not knowing anything.

One of the policemen walked around the dark noisy room full of computers and turned on his torch light to shine at all the guys there.

He then shouted
"SEMUA BALIK RUMAH SEKARANG!!!".

One of the guys turned at the policeman and said
"Boss... last game last game!!!".



Thursday, April 05, 2007

Guilty of Not Updating

Yes.. it is true.. I am guilty of the above crime.

I haven't been updating often enough.

I'm terribly sorry my dear readers but these days I've just been sooo busy I can barely find time for anything.

I will update very soon before you all know it ok?

Wednesday, April 04, 2007

Wen-Qi is Recovering

Wen-Qi was overwhelmed by the response we got from you guys, with so many people wishing her well.

For that I must say thank you.

Wen-Qi has since been discharged from Pantai Hospital and is resting at home with a bandage on her forehead (occasionally making microwave popcorn to kill time).Only thing about her now is that her movements are all very very slow and it hurts whenever she has to laugh.

Please note however that if you were to ever meet Wen-Qi, please DO NOT say
"Hey I heard you banged a wall".

What you SHOULD say is
"Hey I heard a wall banged you".

So please get that right, she did not bang a wall, a wall banged her.

Just yesterday Wen-Qi said to me
"You lied to me in the car! You said it wasn't a serious cut! How could you?"

I guess what I should have said was
"HOLY SHIT THAT IS A SERIOUS WOUND!!! MAKE YOUR PEACE WITH GOD WEN-QI, YOU'RE NOT GONNA MAKE IT!!!".



Monday, April 02, 2007

An Accident and a Meeting

Saturday 31st March 2007.

I woke up at 6am in the morning to drive back from KL to Penang.

I was rushing back to make it for an afternoon meeting with the CEO of a listed company who happens to be in Penang.

In spite of being able to get his phone number through a contact, it took me three weeks of following up to finally get a meeting with this very busy man, so when he offered me an opportunity to meet him on a Saturday, I grabbed it.

I had my chance and I wasn't about to blow it.

By the time the hot afternoon sun hit Penang, I was already at home in the comforts of my room rehearsing whatever I had to say to the CEO.

Wen-Qi even came all over to my place that afternoon to give me some support before my meeting.

Before I knew it, evening came and it was time for me to leave home for the meeting.

Wen-Qi who came in her own car was the first to drive out in her Kelisa, followed by my father who also happened to be going out at the time.

I got into my car as I saw my father's car disappear in the distance and left home.

Just a little down the road from my place, I suddenly saw my father's car stopped by the side of the road.

As I whizzed by not suspecting anything, I caught my father jumping out of his car in a hurry and rushing to the opposite direction.

Wondering what was going on, I looked in my rear view mirror only to see Wen-Qi's Kelisa crashed into a retaining wall; a sight that I had completely missed as I drove past the first time.Pic: The actual wall that Wen-Qi ran into after they cleared the wreckage.

I screeched my car to a stop and rushed out towards the crashed Kelisa.

As the car drew nearer I found myself getting increasingly anxious.

The wreckage was much worse than it looked in the distance.

I reached the driver's door and looked in.

The door was smashed in just like the front of the car and there was shattered glass everywhere.

Wen-Qi was there sitting in the driver's seat dazed and covered with blood.

My heart dropped at the horrifying sight.

She was in pain with her bloody hands covering her eyes crying
"My head... it hurts... it hurts!!!"

I stood shocked for a few seconds, not knowing what to do but I came back to earth when I heard my father shout "GET HER OUT OF THE CAR!!!".

I unlocked the driver's door from the outside and tried to yank it open but the door wouldn't budge.

As I tugged on the driver's door, Wen-Qi was moaning in pain so I tried to comfort her.

"Don't worry don't worry... we're going to get you out of here".

Failing miserably to open the driver's door, I ran over to the front passenger's door and threw it open.

My dad crouched in, released her safety belt that had a layer of blood over it and pulled her out of the wreckage.

I carried Wen-Qi to my car and put her in the back seat wiping the blood off her with as much tissue as I could find in my car.

She had cuts and bruises all over her body but most of the blood was coming from a big cut in her forehead.

My dad gave her a huge stack of tissues and said "PUT PRESSURE ON YOUR WOUND!!!".

I jumped into the driver's seat and drove her off to the nearest hospital (which wasn't exactly a stone's throw away).

My dad led the way in his own car.

I was driving fast praying that there would be no traffic but I was too hopeful.

Traffic was heavy.

Every few seconds, my eyes darted back at Wen-Qi who was in my back seat to see how she was doing.

She was still dazed and kept saying
"What happened? Am I dreaming?... my head hurts so bad... I wanna wake up!!! Please wake me up".

She was bleeding everywhere, her top and skirt were soaked in blood.

It didn't help when she looked at the stack of tissues that she had earlier been using to cover the gash on her forehead.

It too was soaked in blood and the sight of it was a good enough reason for panic.

She cried

"OH MY GOD OH MY GOD.... I'M BLEEDING SO MUCH.. OH MY GOD OH MY GOD!!!".

I looked back and shouted
"DON'T WORRY!!! IT'S JUST A SMALL CUT... DON'T WORRY... YOU'RE FINE!!!".

I felt the guilt right after those words left my mouth.

I didn't know if it was a small cut or not, and it probably wasn't considering the amount of blood there was, but I knew that I had to calm her down though I doubt saying that helped much.

Her thoughts suddenly swinged a full 360 degrees and she said
"OMG!!! Your MEETING... you're going to be late for your meeting!!!".

I replied hastily
"That is the LAST THING I'm worried about right now... I HAVE to get you to a hospital first".

She managed to thank me somewhere in the midst of her pain, only to tell me a few minutes later
"I think I need to puke".

I looked back at her and saw the dreadful expression on her face as she tried to keep herself from puking.

I shouted yet again.
"LOOK... if you have to puke then PUKE here in the car!!! I am NOT stopping till we get to a hospital!".

Puke in the car she did.

She skillfully decorated my car with puke but it wasn't the typical puke you would see from a drunk man.

She was vomiting blood.

That was enough motivation for me.

I stepped on the gas and starting aggressively honking the slow cars ahead of me.


Finally we got to Gleneagles Hospital in Penang but our sense of relief was short-lived.

We got stuck at the entrance.

At Gleneagles whenever a car wants to get into the hospital grounds, it has to first take a parking ticket.

So as any pessimist would guess, when shit happens... it happens not just once or twice at a time, but all in one go.

The ticket machine wasn't working and the barrier wouldn't go up so
both the cars my dad and I were driving were stuck outside the hospital.

We decided to leave our cars by the side of the road as my dad carried Wen-Qi into the emergency room.

I followed to help only to hear my dad say
"Go for your meeting!!!"

I resisted and replied
"How can I go when she's like this?"

But my dad was adamant
"What are you going to do? You've already taken her to the hospital, she's going into the Emergency Room, all you're going to do is WAIT... so JUST GO... I'm taking care of her... and call her parents!".

I stood there for a few seconds thinking about what my father said and decided to listen to him.

So I got into the car and rushed to the meeting place.

When I got there, I first rushed to the restroom to wash up.

The white shirt I was wearing was spattered with blood and as I rinsed my hands in the sink, the water turned red with Wen-Qi's blood.

I washed it all off and tried to calm myself down.

Then I walked confidently into the lounge where I was supposed to meet the CEO and waited.

He came not long after and we talked for more than an hour about Nuffnang (of course with me initially explaining the blood all over me and ensuring him that I didn't just kill someone who didn't like idea of Nuffnang blogs).

My mind was racing back and forth.

On one hand I was wondering what the hell I was doing here at the meeting when I should be with a friend who needs me now more than anything else.

But my Father's words came back to my head and I focused on the meeting.

Right after the meeting ended I rushed into the car and called my father to get an update on the situation.

They had moved from Gleneagles to Loh Guan Lye Hospital because Gleneagles didn't have a brain surgeon present at the time.

But alas some good news.

Wen-Qi had a scan at Loh Guan Lye and they didn't find any damage to the brain, just a hairline crack.

But the cut was very deep, so deep that you could even see her skull. The neurosurgeon at Loh Guan Lye advised us that since the patient is a 19-year old girl, we should instead take her to a plastic surgeon to stitch up her wound. At least the stitches might look better.

We found a plastic surgeon at Pantai Hospital all the way on the other side of the island and we made our way there.
This time with Wen-Qi's father driving the car and I sitting in the back seat with Wen-Qi, trying to make her smile in this difficult time. I succeeded in most instances.

When we reached Pantai Hospital, there were already people waiting to get Wen-Qi on to a wheelchair to wheel her straight into the Emergency Room.

I followed her in.

She was still suffering in pain, at one point even saying that her head was hurting so much she felt like ripping it off.

I took it as a joke.. but I wasn't so sure if she was really joking.

She went into surgery at 9.30PM and her parents told me to go home, saying that she probably wouldn't be awake until the next morning.

I went to see her the morning after. She was lying in bed with a huge bandage on her head.

She gave me a cheeky smile as I walked into her ward which indicated that she was feeling better.

Her pain had subsided and she was feeling a lot better, remembering a bit more of what really happened.


I took of a picture of her in bed and asked
"Your Dad last night asked me if I'm gonna blog about this. Should I?"

She said
"Okayy... but I look so awful nowww"...

I pictured how she looked yesterday right after the accident.

Then I said
"You've never looked better".

It wasn't a lie.


PS: All the pictures in this blog entry (except the first pic) was taken after the incident. I obviously didn't quite have the peace of mind to stop and take a picture during the crisis.

What kind of bastard would I be if I did that?