Saturday, May 31, 2008

Girls Find It Harder To Get Out Of Bed Than Guys

One weekend morning a few months ago, I was driving out of the city towards Klang to meet my friend Boon for a good Bak Kut Teh breakfast. I was supposed to pick him up at Subang Parade and go in my car.

When he hopped in, I asked him
"Oi.. your gf leh?"

And he said
"She's still sleeping. You know I feel that girls always seem to have a harder time getting out of bed than guys".
That's when it struck me.

I thought of someone I had spent time with and it's true. Every morning when I wake up next to her, she's still asleep.

And if I don't intervene to wake her up, the clock will hit 12PM and she'll still be asleep. And believe me, just telling her to "wake up" is not enough to wake her up. First I gotta go turn off the air-con, then pull off the blanket and go make as much noise as I can washing up.

In fact, here's what annoys me the most.

I wake up later than usual when she's around because just when I want to get out of bed and go brush my teeth, she cuddles back into my arms resting her big head on my shoulder and that warm feeling feels soooo good it makes me want to stay in bed.

The next I know I wake up and I'm late for work. Ish... so unproductive!

Then I think back of all the girls I've been with in the past and they're ALL like that. Like getting out of bed in the morning is the most difficult thing they've ever had to do.

(All except one though... who would get up at 6am every morning like clock work. Heck even I can't beat that.)

So do you guys and girls find that to be true or are my cases the exceptions?

Thursday, May 29, 2008

The Clubs in Taiwan

I'm in Singapore again now for business. Ah I've been traveling around so much this past week I'm getting really really tired.

Anyway, while I was working in our little Nuffnang Singapore office, I checked my mail only to see an e-mail that Cely just forwarded me.

It was an e-mail filled with pictures of the night life in Taiwan and it was... WILD!!!I mean Taiwan has always been known to be a great place to party when it comes to nightlife but but.... this is a whole new level of WILD!!!

I mean heck, sometimes I go clubbing here in Penang or KL and I see a club full of guys.

In Taiwan however, not only are there so many chicks but heck... if you could see the stuff they do.
One of the photos that Cely sent me even had one hot Taiwanese girl actually sucking the nipple of another girl IN THE CLUB!!!

Naturally I decided not to put the picture up here haha very rude of me to :P

But check out the other girls!!!HOLY CRAP!!!

These pictures kinda reminded me of an experience I had last year when I was at Taipei's Ministry of Sound with some of my Taiwanese friends.
I was on the way to the toilet in the club when I suddenly saw a group of people crowding around two girls who were arguing ferociously just outside the toilet.

I looked at them for a while but couldn't hear what they were saying. Then one of my friends came up to me and said
"Hey what's up?"

I asked him
"What are those two girls fighting about?"

And his reply shocked me
"Oh I saw them fighting just now. Apparently what happened was this guy came to the club and picked up one of the girls.

Then after dancing with her for some time he disappeared. When the girl went looking for him, she found him dancing with her friend so the both of them started fighting with one of them screaming "WHY YOU STEAL MY GUY!??!?!"".

At that moment I turned to my friend to say

I mean back in reality a.k.a. Malaysia, I hear guys fighting among each other for girls in clubs but never for girls fighting for the guy.

And in Malaysia if the guy did that I would imagine that the first girl would go up to him and give him a big slap.

But NOoooo.. instead she pushed him aside and fought with the second girl he picked up.

And I remember seeing the guy just standing there quietly while the two girls fought.

Here's the best part... the guy wasn't that good looking but the two girls who were fighting.. HOLY CRAP WERE DAMN BLOODY HOT!!

WHY?!?! WHY?!?!?! WHY?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?

One of my aunties used to tell me to be weary of Taiwanese girls. She used to say
"Taiwanese girls will hook you if they think you're rich or successful, get married to you and when you marry her, you marry her whole family. That means you're probably gonna be supporting her entire family as well all down to her brothers and sisters. So be careful ah!".

I thought about what she said for a while.

Then I saw another picture that Cely sent me of a Taiwanese girl.And I decided... F*CK IT!!!



I know Ringo will follow. Right Ringo?

Monday, May 26, 2008

The Weirdest Autograph I Ever Had To Sign

Adrian is a good friend of mine whom I got to know back during my A-Level days.

He's one of those people who is... really really smart (he got straight A's for SPM and A-levels) but enjoys doing really stupid things sometimes and as you can imagine, he's a big fan of the US TV show Jackass.

To name stupid things he does, he once brought his own toilet bowl into an elevator and took a dump there.
And there was the legendary time when he went for an interview for a shipping company and they asked him "So why do you want to work with us?"

His answer was
"Because you guys have lots of ships... and I like ships".

So anyway, Adrian's now settled down and working in Canada. He was only back in Malaysia for 2 weeks and left for Canada just a week ago. While he was here, he took the opportunity to meet up with a lot of our friends from college who are now all doing very different things.
The bulk of our college friends are working at the Big Four audit firms or banks, one or two of them in PR, one or two of them in Law and just one of them running his family business.

We were all catching up in his home and Googling our names when Adrian suddenly saw the BusinessWeek article where I was nominated as one of the Top 25 Young Entrepreneurs in Asia last year.He jumped up and shouted

And he lifted up his T-Shirt.
At first I thought he was joking. I mean anyone would have thought so right?

But when it comes to Adrian and when something stupid is suggested... he's never joking.

So I got myself the nearest marker I could find and signed on his left tit.Signing on a boob is harder than it looks actually.

I could barely make out my signature once I was done with it.

So there you have it everyone.

Brad Pitt or McDreamy probably gets a nice set of boobs from a hot girl to sign on.
I get to sign on a hairy man boob.

Doesn't it RAWK being Timothy Tiah?

Sunday, May 25, 2008

Mysterious Girl on my Facebook

I was just logging on to Facebook a few days ago, something I very VERY rarely do but just somehow decided to do it anyway out of boredom and I found that there were quite a number of people in my friend list that I somehow don't seem to know but yet at some point in the past had confirmed them as friends.

I'm sure this happens to a lot of people.

Now here's what really caught my attention. I was browsing my friend updates when I came across this 'friend' of mine.

Her name is Carmen Bianca.

Heck I thought I would KNOW if I knew a hot girl like that and I have no clue how she ended up on my list. I certainly didn't add her... heck I've never went looking to add any of my friends on Facebook before, partly because I hardly spend enough time there. And even if I DID find her, I wouldn't add her as a friend.

HOW DO YOU BE FRIENDS WITH A GIRL WHO LOOKS LIKE THAT?!?!You've either gotta be gay or really really gay to be able to be friends with someone like that.

And if something made me even more curious was that the update that I saw from her said
"Carmen is single and looking".

She had also recently bought me for $885 (I am sooo cheap).

So anyway I sent her a message that said
"Do I know you?"

And somehow it just occurred to me that it might've been a bit rude of me to phrase it like that but oh well....

Anyone here can shed some light on how I know Carmen?

Update: So you guys DID shed some light on who the girl in the picture is.. it's LEAH DIZON!!! HAHAHAHA FARK... that means the real Carmen Bianca is probably a really fugly guy. Lucky I didn't try to pick her/him up. "Hey Baby... How you doing?".

PS: If you don't know who Leah Dizon is click here.

Friday, May 23, 2008

Funny Big Mac Chant Videos

Nuffnang has been running this campaign for McDs lately for the Big Mac Chant where bloggers just find whatever creative ways they can to say

"“Two All-Beef Patties,
Special Sauce, Lettuce,
Cheese, Pickles, Onions
On A Sesame Seed Bun!"

The videos I've been watching are hilarious.

Heck check out any of the videos on the microsite, any random one I clicked seemed to have thousands of views.... THOUSANDS!!

Okay let me share a few here which I thought were great. This one done by a bunch of Penangites at the McDs in 1-Stop Penang.


Then there's this one by Sewjin which I thought was great... LOL Sewjin.

If you guys wanna see the rest of the videos, or compete with these people to win the RM10,000 then click here.

Here's the thing.

I really really wanna do this Big Mac Chant thing. Maybe its peer pressure because everyone is doing it but heck I don't know what to do.

All these people set the bar so high up!!!

What do I do what do I do????

Anyone got any ideas??? I only have a few days left before the deadline!

Wednesday, May 21, 2008

A Conversation


Jane: Pfft... you guys... always objectifying women! Treating women like objects!

John: What?

Jane: It's just disgusting that you guys always treat us like sex objects. How would you like it if we talked of you as a THING rather than a person?

John: You mean if girls talk about me being a sex object for them? THAT IS AWESOME STUFF!!!

Jane: You chauvinistic PIG!

John: What?? Tim help me out here.

Tim: Uhmm.. hey look... elephant!!! *points away*

Tuesday, May 20, 2008

My New Business Idea - Monetizing Boobs

I've just got a new business idea for anyone who might want to start it.

Okay here's the thing. I've always been thinking about the blind spot that some people eventually develop with advertisements. Whatever medium you use, sooner or later some people might just stop paying attention to the ad you have.

For example, you may drive on a road but not notice a billboard ad or you might be watching TV and not notice the ads because every time there's a commercial break you go get a drink.

So I was thinking... what is it... that people will always watch or look at without fail and it came to me just recently.

Here's how.

Somehow quite a number of the female friends I hang out with tend to be very well endowed and they're not afraid to flaunt it. So they wear fairly low cut tops sometimes to show it off a little.I notice when I walk with them anywhere in public, say at The Curve, out of every 10 people we walk past, 8 of them will take a good look at the breasts and it doesn't matter if the people passing by are guys or girls, both guys and girls look at Cleavage.

Now this is something that people are ALWAYS gonna be looking at.

I mean fine you can say that say if you run a social-networking site and display ads, maybe one day people might get bored of social-networking and you'll lose your audience but hey... correct me if I'm wrong but BOOBIES HAVE BEEN AROUND FOR BLOODY CENTURIES... AND YET US MEN HAVE YET TO GET BORED OF THEM.

And here's another good thing about it. Boob Ads... ARE MOBILE!!! They go everywhere!!!!

So ladies... you're all soo very very powerful and all hold SOOOO MUCH POWER IN YOUR HANDS... all we need to do is find a way to monetize all the booby space out there.

And to do that... all we have to do is... PUT ADS ON THE CLEAVAGE!!!And it can work like that... First you gotta convince the dear ladies to join your so called "Ad network" . So all these nice ladies become your publishers and will run the ads.

All you have to do is produce the ads (ie paint them on the boobies or whatever) and find advertisers (okay fine this is easier said than done but nothing worth having comes easy).

You see people putting ads on everything these days, from envelopes to greetings cards to benches to walls... why have we missed the place that EVERYONE IS BOUND TO LOOK AT?!?!

And here's the thing.. if you're a guy... BoobAds will do you some good. Say the next time you get caught staring at a girl's boobs, you could just say

"Hey sorry... was trying to see what the website address was for that awesome computer you're advertising on your boobs".

So who wants to start this business?

We can call it... BoobAds - Monetize your breasts today!Lets start on a business plan to get some funding.

Anyone keen on investing?


PS: It's hiring time again at Nuffnang and this time we're looking for Web Designers. Anyone keen on joining our ever so funny team e-mail me at okie?

Sunday, May 18, 2008

Determination *sigh*

If you ask some of my closest friends about me (like Hasan in the picture below), one of the things among the other good and bad things they'll tell you is that I'm a very very determined person and if there's anything that I've grown confident about... it's in my determination.The history of this goes all the way back even to when I was in high school. I wasn't a very good student all the way up to Form 1... mainly because I hated studying. By the time I got into Form 2, I had began to realize how stupid I am and started trying to be the model student.

That means I didn't just start studying hard, I started taking up all sorts of activities and being the top in them. By the time I finished school, I had been the top of the form (well only once, most of the time I ended up somewhere in Top 5), was the Head of the Debate Department in the English Language Society in school (one of the biggest and most powerful societies back then), and Captain of the school and zone table tennis team.

I carried forward that same kind of determination when Nuffnang came about. When we first started off, we didn't have the huge clients we have today. Far from that in fact... but I was determined to grow the network's ad spend. That means taking every deal I could get.

The smallest deal I had EVER taken in my history of Nuffnang was a RM100 campaign. That's right.. RM100 for some online store. Today of course Nuffnang has a minimum ad spend that goes into the thousands but that was another time altogether.

Being determined has got to be the one thing in life that everyone can be if he/she wants to be. I didn't always use to be like that though, there was a time in my life where I gave up very very easily on things I wanted badly but didn't want to fight for.

But that all changed one day when I decided never to give up on something I really really wanted and never to let anything or anyone get in your way. It's very simple to do since you choose whether to give up or not.

You have control over that. Sometimes you don't have control of the results for the work you put in but you always have control on whether you want to keep trying or not.

Keep trying and you'll eventually get what you want. At least... that's what I thought... until today.

A few days ago I was talking to KY about going for an 8 Course Dinner at JW Marriot and to watch the premier of Made of Honor.Hong Leong was nice enough to give out 80 seats for Nuffnangers to attend which is not too many to go around, so in order to narrow it down we decided to get everyone to play this fishing game on their website.

KY had just played it and we were talking on MSN when we had this conversation.
In my defence, I was thinking to myself that hey.. it's just some fishy game right? All we have to do is just play it over and over again until you get a high score.

Well I've been playing it for 3 days now.... and the highest score I got is this.

I don't have the determination to play any more... :(

KY, I give up.

You win. I owe you a plate of Char Kueh Teow.

You bastard!

If you guys think you can do better than me. Click here.

Friday, May 16, 2008

Am I Less Happier Than Before?

In my 2nd year at university in London, I used to share a flat with two girls there, one named Julia, a British-Born Chinese

and another Gene whom I happened to meet for lunch just a few weeks ago (and whom I can't seem to find a picture of at the moment.. ish).

Just like a lot of my other friends, Gene has now come back to be a very high-flying professional, a lawyer... at one of the best law firms in Malaysia.

As we sat down for lunch at Carls Junior exchanging stories of what we've been up to since graduation, Gene suddenly found the courage to say
"Tim... you're very different now from how you were back at university."
I raised an eyebrow
"Huh?? You mean different as in fatter? Yes I know I'm fat now".

And she replied
"No... different as in.. you used to be a very happy person. Now you often look very tensed up and stressed and we can't even have a proper lunch ON A SUNDAY because you keep getting all these phone calls from clients".

I was appalled.. is my work taking over me.. beginning to consume me as a person?

I took it lightly until recently when I was in Bangkok I got into a fight with *ahem* because we spent our last day in Bangkok in the hotel room while I talked business in the hotel room rather than actually going out.Same fight different day lah.
"You're on HOLIDAY!!! Why can't you just forget all that now?"

"I have to work lah! How do you think I earn the money to come here in the first place?"

So now that I know that maybe... just maybe it is possible that I've started losing it and becoming very addicted to work but to say that I am very different from who I was a few years ago back at university is..... shocking.

Okay why don't you guys be the judge.

This is how I looked like 5 years ago.
Hahahaha no I'm kidding. That's my friend Joe who went to Cambridge University.

Okay.. THIS is how I looked like 5 years ago (on the left).

This is how I looked like 4 years ago (second from the left).

This is how I looked like 3 years ago

This is how I looked like 2 years ago (the one on the right).

This is how I looked like 1 year ago (the one on the left... duh the one on the right of course) :P
And this is how I look like today.

Do I look any less happier?

I don't really see why and I can't really see why I should. Sure I tend to work a lot sometimes at the oddest hours but I love my work because I love the people it involves.

I love my colleagues at Nuffnang who are also passionate, full of energy and always happy to crack a joke.
I love some of my clients who pay us money but yet treat me like their closest friends.

I love some of the nicest bloggers out there who are ever so supportive of what Nuffnang does.

So what is there not to love about work?

Ming in one of his previous internet ventures had this tagline
"If you ain't fun, you aren't doing it right".

I think maybe... just maybe... we're doing it right.

Wednesday, May 14, 2008

Meeting Paul Moss

One of the perks of being in the advertising industry is that you often get to meet quite a number of local celebrities.

My problem however is that I'm very very very bad with knowing who local celebrities are.

Let me tell you how stupid I am.

Once I was introduced to Rudy from Rudy & JJ's breakfast show. He introduced himself as "Rudy" and I said "Hi I'm Tim".

Now I've seen many pictures of how Rudy & JJ look like but I STILL DIDN'T RECOGNIZE HIM!!! And if anything... I am one of the biggest fans of the Hitz.FM Morning Crew. I listen to them every other morning!!!

Bloody hell!!! If I had known he was Rudy from Rudy & JJ I would've squealed like a schoolgirl and say
"OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG I LOVEEEE YOUUUUUU.... Please sign my butt cheek!!!!"

Fortunately another time when I met Joey G at an event some time back, someone was nice enough to tell me that he was a celebrity so I would know how to go up and take a picture with him.So anyway a few days ago I heard that I was going to meet Paul Moss for some meeting. Before I went for the meeting though I wanted to make sure that I went prepared and knew at least something about Paul Moss.

Heck I knew he is a judge at One In A Million and is known for giving straightforward honest opinions like Simon Cowell.

I mean you gotta love Simon Cowell... he talks sense.. unlike silly Paula.I get so frustrated watching American Idol and waiting for Paula to quickly say whatever rubbish she was going to say.. not like anyone cares about her opinion anyway.

I did a small poll on my sidebar recently and found that 72% of my readers think that Paula gives irrelevant opinions in American Idol.And it's true.. nobody cares about the other two judges.

Well actually.. okay fine fine. Randy does give some proper feedback with substance but PAULA!!!

I mean heck.

I could go there and stomp my feet and scream around with some unaudible awful awful song and Paula Abdul will still say to me

"Timothy... I feel so happy for you. You look beautiful today and you were wonderful and I'm so proud of you because you're not afraid to show us who you are... yabber yabber yabber... come give me a hug".
And she says that for everyone that performs.

So uhmm.. wait where was I... oh shit sorry okok I got sidetracked there.

Alright so anyway I was doing a bit of reading up on Paul Moss and I found out that he was the producer for Juliet The Orange. JULIET THE ORANGE!!! HOLY COWW!!!


THAT SONG BRINGS ME MEMORIES OF MY HIGH SCHOOL DAYS!!! And I still remember back then that I couldn't believe it was a song by a local artiste because well.. back then there weren't many local artists singing english songs.


When I first shook hands with Paul Moss the next day I said
He looked kinda surprised almost as if I was the first person who ever said that to him but he was polite about it.

I can't believe it!!!

Does everyone else not like eyelash?

Come on.. okay watch this music video and listen to the song.

If you've heard it before.. then you know you're old like me :P

If you haven't.. then... you're probably a lot older than me... or a lot younger :P

Note the people in the video are not Juliet The Orange. Don't think it's an official music video.

Juliet The Orange is a group of two girls who look like this.