Monday, February 12, 2007

One Terabyte of Porn

A recent conversation with a friend of mine who lives in the UK.

Friend: Congratulate me Boss, for I have just used up all 1 terabyte of Hard Disk Space for porn.

Me: ...


Me: Well done... I can't think of a better use of Hard Disk Space and your UK broadband line.


For those of you who don't know, 1 terabyte = 1,024 GB.

Now lets put things into perspective.


1 terabyte = 1,024 GB = 1,048,576 MB

Assuming a good quality movie is 700MB for one and a half hours.

(1,048,576/700) = 1,498 movies.

Since each movie is one and a half hours, 1,498 movies is 2,247 hours.

So if you were going to watch one terabyte of porn... it would take you 93 days (3 months) non-stop assuming you don't eat, shit, sleep or do anything other than watch porn!


I bet the visionary who invented the Hard Drive said decades ago
"Hard Disks in the future will be used to store all sorts of important information from financial records, to research material to historical archives".


And I bet today if he finds out where the bulk of Hard Disk Space is going, he'll be thinking
"CRAP! How the hell did I NOT see that coming?"

Disclaimer: If you live in Malaysia... please DON'T TRY TO BEAT THAT RECORD... partly because PORN IS ILLEGAL in Malaysia... but also because our lines are slow enough after the earthquake... so please don't slow them down even more with your torrents!!!!

Have mercy on the people that depend on the internet to make a living (like Stewie).



42 comments:

suicidalconversationjunkie said...

I'M THE KING OF THE WORLD!!!!!!!!
FIRST!!!!!!!! HoOoOoOOOOOoooooOOO~~~~~~~~~~~

You all may rise now. Yes, quit looking at me with envy and admiration. it bugs me. bwahahahahhahahaha :p

suicidalconversationjunkie said...

by the way boss, are u sure u weren't monologue-ing?? heheheh :p

suicidalconversationjunkie said...

oh look! i was 2nd!!!

and now i'm 3rd!!! wahahahaha it's never been this fun to be so jakun. i've never been this on time before steady la boss nxt time you come Jb i buy u breakfast/lunch/dinner/supper feed gau u fat fat prosper the banyak!

suicidalconversationjunkie said...

i really shouldn't spam you, but you know, since there's really no one else around here.. I can't resist!!

NUMBER FOUR!

i hope nobody refuses to post in their disgust at my obnoxious-ness. *act innocent*

suicidalconversationjunkie said...

ok la and here's my last one. for this spree anyway. woohoo!

Benjamin said...

*checks my own stack of porn*

i am 1% there.

cely said...

.... suidical !

good news.. for porn surfer.. ahahah

Boss Stewie said...

suicidal LOL look at you! spammer!!!

benjamin: hahahaha

cely: dun encourage... dun dun!!! u know my poor leetle dotcom is struggling to reach deadline with delays caused by our extremely slow internet connection?

reallybites said...

so boss, how much space does your porn takes up? :P

Infectioner said...

I don't think your friend really watch 3 months non-stop to finish it lor. Where got ppl really watch a porn movie without fast-forward and then rewind back and then fast-forward again wan? Except me lar coz i dun watch wan. :P

So he surely can finish it in AN HOUR. XD

William Leong said...

Why dun have pics to garnish this post one? I dun understand what it means, any pics to give better detailed explanation.

Fei said...

*jaw drops*


I bet you're asking him to burn everything for you right? nyehehehehe

mae said...

People who watch porn are sad lonely people.. I feel sorry for your sad, lonely friend.. Boss, go find one cha boh for him la. Waitttt. Its a him right?? =O

daphne said...

huh ... why do guys talk abt their porn collection with such pride?

ok, so u guys need to watch it. but jus shut up n watch alone mah. why muz u share the info with the whole wide world? n worst stil, share it with ur friends?!

n yes. msia internet connection speed sucks. our max is 1mbps?! sigh.

andrew said...

HAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA
will, i agree!!!
hahaha i dont get it lah *bluh look*
please have some pictures to illustrate ur points boss
wat is porn?
sounds like prawn, i really feel u should post some pictures to clarify it with me and william haha ;)

Taoke said...

wa gnn 1terabyte of porn ..

he be dominatin in penang man lol

Gwen said...

I burrrrrn all my porns into DVDs and bought a DVD player for my big screen tv that plays burned data DVDs so I can watch upstairs. I have a wide collection but mostly it's hentai LOL coz OMG tentakuru!!!

(notice I'm not a guy)

Boss Stewie said...

reallybites: hahaha!!!

infectioner: wah how do u know people fast forward and rewind back if u don't watch porn? :P

william: HAHAH!!! cannot cannot.. as much as i can.. i try to keep this blog cleaaan :P

fei: noo larr... burn.. how many cds also cannot finish....

mae: this friend has no trouble finding char boh mae.. trust me

daphne: hahaha! it's a guy thing.. just like how it's hard to understand why a guy has to tell everyone about a girl he shagged... instead of keep it quiet to himself.

andrew: ok i put a picture of a prawn there then

taoke: hahaha! yes 1 terabyte.. he reach nirvana di

gwen: u are such a cool wife

Hasan said...

I can't believe how dirty and disturbed this blog is getting day by day. Next time on Timoth Tiah: How to eat a mango seductively.

Julia said...

hi infectioner, you BIG FAT LIAR. unless ur a girl, its impossible that you do not watch porn. MEN MUST WATCH PORN, for they are not men if they do not. then your balls are redundant.

William Leong said...

wahhh, julia a bit the harsh there right?

hasan, how about "Timoth Tiah: How to eat a mango seductively on a Mac"?

earl-ku said...

lets not look at how much porns you have but rather how many space of yours are used up for porns ...

by looking at how many space you have and how many of those are u using it for porns will be a tter gauge to determine how hamsap he is ... haha

as for me i am using bout 50% of my hdd space ... excluding my external hdd ... which is already full ... haha

Boss Lepton said...

sigh....

looks like we need to revise our "nirvana" rule

5 yrs ago, 10Gb of porn would make us achieve nirvana, now i think we need at least 250Gb to 1 Nirvana

Boss Stewie said...

hasan: u already know how to do that hasan :P

william: hahahaha !!! you remember that hasan hates mac

earl: and how big is the total capacity of all your HDs?

boss: HHAHAHAHAH that is true!

hasan said...

damnit tim. is everyone who sees me in malaysia going to think "there goes the mac hating coconut groper"? Thats it, i'm going to protest further inclusions of me on your blog.

MaN|acZ said...

so I guessed 1TB of pr0n covers all categories of pr0n liao eh?

maybe he should write a thesis on pr0n.

rofl.

clem said...

'mac hating coconut groper' LOL. that isn't too bad of a title. :p

the question is: how the heck does your friend managed to get 1TB HDD in the first place? Does it exist (commercially)? or does he have mountains of dvds?

suicidalconversationjunkie said...

i just realised ur friend may die of penile rupture due to excessive handrubbingagainstbrotheractions. and notice how jakun my term is? i agree with lance and will. muahahahaha :p

Gwen said...

@ hasan: AHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!! that's like ... the best coined phrase EVER! *kowtow*

cely said...

ask me to encourage,, u pulak buat promosi here! blek

Please look for porn FREE SEX VIDEO gay video free sex movie download here at timothytiah.blogspot.com


MUAHAHAHA

Dr.M said...

looks like any google search on porn, gay, sex will lead to ur page d...

Lance said...

suicidalconversationjunkie: Ermm, I haven't commented anything yet. ^^;

Boss: Hear hear.

dr. m: HEAR HEAR! =D

Anonymous said...

FIRST MUTHAFUCKAZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ

rootified said...

i'm last now! bwahahahhaa

boss, good quality one is 1GB++ DVD quality one laaaa lol...

and who's gonna watch the WHOLE length? we just gonna use maybe 20~30minutes of them every several days only ma... :P

suicidalconversationjunkie said...

oh shit. lance!! so paiseh!!! hahaha i meant andrew. ;p

Andrew said...

omg!
suicidal %&$^#&$^%^@&%^!!!!!
paiseh to lance for wat?
me lah! %&$^#&%^#$&%^#$!!!!
hahahaha

eh boss, ur this friend right, is he horny horny horny?
or maybe he has a little secret to hide about his masculinity?
u know, like short people will feel insecure and build big big tall tall houses e.g. the short king in shrek (if u watched it)
so maybe he has tons and tons of porn to cover for his err heh heh heh
im kiddin by the way, no offence noted :)

mae said...

If can kao char boh already still wanna watch porn... Tell me now what's wrong with this person? Prefers to "love himself" more is it? I'm not feeling myself today, really sleepy right now too.. x_x

Boss Stewie said...

hasan: LOL!

maniacz: i'll suggest that to him :P

clem: oh nono.. he probably has a few external HDs

suicidal: HAHAHAHA u ar


gwen: ehh whose side are u on now gwen?

cely: WOI!

dr m : haihh... unfortunately those people who come to my blog looking for those things will be disappointed


lance: hear hear!

anonymous: lol ... far from first wei

rootified: hahaha... okok 1gb it is

andrew: ehh... careful.. my friend reads my blog.. if he reads what u just said ... hhaha!

Gwen said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Gwen said...

Hasan more handsome than you worr ... hmm hard to decide ... maybe you should grow some face pubes then I'll reconsider. Ekeke

Boss Stewie said...

gwen: FACE PUBES... EWWWwww

dr.m betul punya said...

who is dr.m... im the real dr.m