Gwen's Tarot Reading

Every now and then my readers would do something to make me happy or laugh.

Whether it's forwarding funny e-mails, leaving funny comments, fighting for the "First" to comment... you guys always make me happy even when I'm feeling down in the crapper.

Now recently, one of my readers named Gwen, decided to entertain me further by giving me a Tarot Reading.

She is apparently very good at these things and her predictions were true in many cases.

This is what her cards predicted about me (in her exact words).



The first card represents your general environment and emotions at present: Violence! Stubbornness with a tinge of vehemence, you seek the death of someone :P

Stewie: WHAT?!?! I DON'T FEEL LIKE KILLING ANYONE!!! (Apart from the people who call me fat).



The second card are the obstacles that you are facing in your life (whether it be known to you or not):
Cruelty, perversion, barbarity and have evil intentions, emotions that conflict with how you should behave in society

Stewie: So I am cruel, a pervert, a barbarian and I have evil intentions (to take over the world).... Thanks Gwen.



The third card is a symbol of what crowns you, ie. the best that you will ever be, but have not achieved it yet:
You want to be a good person, and become very strict with yourself. Your life will be great if you only had discipline. You can achieve the level of respect that you can get, but you'll have to bypass your obstacles first.

Stewie: You mean I don't have discipline? WHAT?!? THAT IS SO NOT TRUE. I stopped going out clubbing and drinking late at night since I started having to wake up early for work every morning.



The fourth card is something that you already have in your talent pool, something you can use as a factor to overcome your obstacles:
You have strength, determination, and a complex mind, says you're also comfortable undertaking many positions that are not typical.

Stewie: I don't know if this is true in myself but some of my friends have told me this before.



Your fifth card determines your past:
There has been a record of pain, and sickness, loss and disaster.

Stewie: Can you blame me for this? I had a girlfriend who left me for my childhood friend, then went on to sleep with another friend of mine. Then many years later came back into my life just to sleep with another one of my childhood friends... but cheated on that childhood friend by sleeping with another friend of mine...



The sixth determines your future and what's to come:
Again loss, probably something of yours will get stolen ... something that is taken away for the better.

Stewie: Alright... which one of you bastards is going to sleep with my next girlfriend?



The first card represents your attitude about yourself and the world:
You have a curious understanding of the world and dont' mind doing dirty work.

Stewie: This is true.



The reading on your attitude right now also says:
You have activity, and the parth of such activity, swiftness, as that of an express messenger, great haste.

Stewie: Yeah quite true as well.



The Second card reflects your environment, family and those around you and how they influence you:
Your friends are sources of great happiness and you often rely on them to get the inside scoop on anything. You have many many loyal friends and family. They look up to you and expect a lot from you too.

Stewie: True but they missed out one thing: My readers are also a source of great happiness to me.



The third card interprets your hopes and fears:
You're very cautious about being seen as a selfish person, you like to have many friends (in a crowd) and only have very few that you truly enjoy being with, maybe as few as just one that you trust and hold dear.

Stewie: Ahh... ah yes fine fine... true. Ah Bop is the one I hold dear.
The last card represents what will come: You will experience joy, contentment and security, it also says you will get fatter (I didn't write this!!! the direct words used are "abundance and nourishment")

Stewie: DID YOU JUST CALL ME FAT?!?! READ THE FIRST CARD YOU JUST READ OUT TO ME!!!!


PS: The new banner was designed by Gwen.
In case you're wondering, it's a night view of Penang! See... we have lights in Penang too!

Thanks for the banner Gwen :P